Michael Maiello's picture

    Amazon Should Go to H--

    I expect you've all noticed that Amazon has started up a race to the bottom among suitor cities who would like to house it's next headquarters.  I think I've come up with a better spot...  I can't take the credit, though. Hail Satan!

    My third McSweeney's piece!

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    Congrats, Mike! It's brilliant.


    Thank you Michael. If there is a Satan in hell, Jeff Bezos is indeed his kindred earthly spirit.


    This is why I see authenticity in your piece: he knows: It is especially easy to get from Hell to LaGuardia. Most people can’t even tell they’ve made the trip.

    P.S. FWIW, re:your illustration, did you know he tweets to Satan often? Examples:

    Dear Satan, I just want to thank you personally for making micro USB plugs almost impossible to determine which way is up.

    — Steve Martin (@SteveMartinToGo) August 14, 2017

    Dear Satan, thanks for eliminating my "markup and reply" feature on my iPhone. Now it's back and I realize you were just messin' with me.

    — Steve Martin (@SteveMartinToGo) August 31, 2017

    p.p.s. Borowitz's latest is almost as good as yours. Of course, Trump White House P.R. is such an easy topic.


    He's just one of the best, isn't he?


    Have you ever seem him in his civilian persona around town? I have, at art functions and art galleries. He seems a very quiet guy, both thoughtful and polite, almost shy, one would think: serious writer, not comic performer.


    I've never seen him in person.  I'm a huge fan of his writing, though. Picasso at the Lapin Agile is really one of my favorite plays.


    WHY DO BILLIONAIRE CORPS NEED MORE HELP FROM THE GOVERNMENT?

    Reminds me of george W making millions from borrowed money while he put together some deal for a football stadium in Texas.

    The deal was based upon tax credits, locally.

    DAMN!


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