Genghis on Debt Ceiling II: Return of the Boehner
Gallup: Obama 45, Romney 45
Fact That Things Suck Cited As Impediment To Re-Election
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Genghis on Debt Ceiling II: Return of the Boehner Gallup: Obama 45, Romney 45 Fact That Things Suck Cited As Impediment To Re-Election |
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Thanking God—the one, true Catholic God—for another glorious morning, Rick drove up to the gleaming Santorum Headquarters. Despite his devoted staff, the operation had barely turned a profit in recent years, especially after the profound misunderstanding over his house in Penn Hills. But private consulting had been lucrative and the boyishly handsome conservative icon remained confident that recent efforts to expand his base would bear fruit.
The guard recognized him, smiled brightly and opened the electrified gate. "Early again, Senator?" he asked. Though he had lost his seat on a technicality, Rick would always be a Senator to the faithful. He smiled and drove through, thinking, "Either that's a heck of a tan, or he's really bla ..." but was interrupted by the ring of his cruciform cell phone, "Do-mi-ne! Do-mi-ne!"
"Senator? I'm sorry to bother you, but I can't figure something out."
"What is it honey?" he cheerfully replied to his faithful wife.
"I'm trying to play this new mp3 player you left me, but I can't find where the headphone jack fits in."
"I didn't leave you a new player."
"Well, Senator, silly me. It sure looks like one. It's round with lots of colored buttons."
With a sick feeling, Rick deftly pulled into his parking space. "How many buttons? Count the buttons!"
"OK, hang on .... twenty-six, twenty-seven, yes, twenty-eight buttons. Why?"
"Are any missing?"
"Missing? No."
"Where are the girls?" The Santorums had a large family, as God intended, and several God-fearing daughters. But Rick knew that 98% of Catholics were regularly abusing God's plan with a truly evil invention—and he didn't want his girls at risk. "Get them out of there. I'll have Opus Dei sweep the house." Reaching the front door, Rick ran into the lobby and ordered the desk officer to get the Prelate on the encrypted line.
"Again?" moaned his wife, "Last week all they found were some MegaDeth CDs, and they whipped all of us anyway. I don't mind so much, but I think the boys are starting to enjoy it."
"Well, OK, we'll hold off this time. But I think you're holding ... contraceptives!"
"Really? I've never seen them so close. How do they work?"
"Foolish woman! Hurl them away! Don't even give Satan half a chance!" Rick knew this called for more than mortification of the flesh. He dialed the Red, White and Blue Fund. "This is Saint Rickum," he said, disguising his voice as well. "We have a contra indication ... at the house ... and she's confused ... you know what to do." Hanging up quickly, he caught his breath. "If this story ever gets out," he thought, "I'll have to get a real job."
By Nancy Benac, Associated Press, May 16, 2012
After the nastiness of the Republican primary race, former candidates have collective amnesia about Romney disses
Note to self: you think you're so smart about this kinda stuff, but you yourself fell for it once again.....so much for all the prognostication about one of our political parties disintegrating from all the primary campaign animosity.
Pew Resarch Center for the People and the Press, May 15, 2012
For decades survey research has provided trusted data about political attitudes and voting behavior, the economy, health, education, demography and many other topics. But political and media surveys are facing significant challenges as a consequence of societal and technological changes.
It has become increasingly difficult to contact potential respondents and to persuade them to participate. The percentage of households in a sample that are successfully interviewed – the response rate – has fallen dramatically. At Pew Research, the response rate of a typical telephone survey was 36% in 1997 and is just 9% today. The general decline in response rates is evident across nearly all types of surveys, in the United States and abroad. At the same time, greater effort and expense are required to achieve even the diminished response rates of today. These challenges have led many to question whether surveys are still providing accurate and unbiased information [....]
On May 16, 2012 at 7:00 PM, the Ride of Silence will begin in North America and roll across the globe. Cyclists will take to the roads in a silent procession to honor cyclists who have been killed or injured while cycling on public roadways. Although cyclists have a legal right to share the road with motorists, the motoring public often isn't aware of these rights, and sometimes not aware of the cyclists themselves.
...
The Ride of Silence is a free ride that asks its cyclists to ride no faster than 12 mph, wear helmets, follow the rules of the road and remain silent during the ride. There are no sponsors and no registration fees. The ride, which is held during National Bike Month, aims to raise the awareness of motorists, police and city officials that cyclists have a legal right to the public roadways. The ride is also a chance to show respect for and honor the lives of those who have been killed or injured.
A new UCLA rat study is the first to show how a diet steadily high in fructose slows the brain, hampering memory and learning — and how omega-3 fatty acids can counteract the disruption. The peer-reviewed Journal of Physiology publishes the findings in its May 15 edition.
"Our findings illustrate that what you eat affects how you think," said Fernando Gomez-Pinilla, a professor of neurosurgery at the David Geffen School of Medicine at UCLA and a professor of integrative biology and physiology in the UCLA College of Letters and Science. "Eating a high-fructose diet over the long term alters your brain's ability to learn and remember information. But adding omega-3 fatty acids to your meals can help minimize the damage."
While earlier research has revealed how fructose harms the body through its role in diabetes, obesity and fatty liver, this study is the first to uncover how the sweetener influences the brain.
The UCLA team zeroed in on high-fructose corn syrup, an inexpensive liquid six times sweeter than cane sugar, that is commonly added to processed foods, including soft drinks, condiments, applesauce and baby food. The average American consumes more than 40 pounds of high-fructose corn syrup per year, according to the U.S. Department of Agriculture.
"We're not talking about naturally occurring fructose in fruits, which also contain important antioxidants," explained Gomez-Pinilla, who is also a member of UCLA's Brain Research Institute and Brain Injury Research Center. "We're concerned about high-fructose corn syrup that is added to manufactured food products as a sweetener and preservative."
[Better write this down]
Christopher Doyon, a.k.a. Commander X, sits atop a hillside in an undisclosed location in Canada, watching a reporter and photographer make their way along a narrow path to join him, away from the prying eyes of law enforcement.
It’s been a few weeks of encrypted emails back and forth, working out the security protocol to follow for interviewing Doyon, one of the brains behind Anonymous, now a fugitive from the FBI.
Doyon, who readily admits taking part in some of the highest-profile hacktivist attacks on websites last year — from Tunisia to Orlando, Sony to PayPal — was arrested in September for a comparatively minor assault on the county website of Santa Cruz, Calif., where he was living, in retaliation for the town forcibly removing a homeless encampment on the courthouse steps.
The “virtual sit-in” lasted half an hour. For that, Doyon is facing 15 years in jail.
According to Saint Rickum's church (sure it isn't St. Rectum?) that if a man spills his seed for any reason other than to procreate, then he is guilty of not only violating a holy tenet by utilizing a form of contraception, but also abortion since his seed is 'a living organism that is given man only to create a human's birth'. Now, this also means that males who use Viagra and other like performance enhancements for anything but the ability to create life is also a mega sinner. Hmmm.
Geez, so many quips and puns are just whirling around, but I'll restrain myself. Gosh, I may have to open chat room 'cuz really have some good ones.
sigh.
ricky saintorum!
that's all I got. hahahahah
I would have bet big bucks you would choose Saint Rectum as his nom de plume.