William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Julian Assange must die! For starters

    Much has been said about Julian Assange and Wikileaks. The Australian-born hacker has put America in grave danger due to his publication of classified information that someone else stole.

    And he must die.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Breaking: Fecal Matter rapidly nearing Fan, no one noticing

    WORLD - Fecal matter is within 13 centimeters of the fan, say noted Swedish researchers in a study to be published in the journal "Hey, We Might Just Be Boned Here Annual." Leading Researcher Tim Jöhnson said the proximity of the fecal matter to the fan should be cause for alarm, but apparently isn't.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    William K. Wolfrum's Morning: Let us Pug

    Pug Jesus 

    Behold his glory.

    News/Politics

    Haiti Water: Haiti has dirty water. Yes, the U.S. played a role in that.  

    Chandra Levy: Slain intern's family sees justice.  

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Apocalypse strikes – Conservatives declare victory

    Nov. 23, 2015 — Stating that he’d “Grown bored with the bullshit,” God Almighty announced he was unleashing the Apocalypse some 900 years early.

    “Time goes crazy fast for me and all, but this is unbearable,” said Almighty, 43, adding cryptically, “I have other civilizations to deal with.”

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Barack Obama preemptively shuts down Government to appease Republicans

    WASHINGTON – Continuing his pattern of negotiating before being at the negotiating table, President Barack Obama shut down the Federal Government today.

    “We must work together,” said Obama, on the 16th hole of Pebble Beach. “By shutting down the government right now, we’re showing Republicans that we are open to their suggestions.”

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