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    Jesus Christ he was enormous

    Bill’s Beginner’s Bible Presents:
    Jesus Christ Was He Enormous

    By William K. Wolfrum

    Chapter 1

    Genesis 6: 1-4 tells us that “there were giants in the Earth in those days.” Like all statements coming from the Word of God, this is factually true. There were, in fact, giants. And none were more giant than Jesus Christ.

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    Confusing Blogger Vows to Quit Using Emoticons in 2010

    BRAZIL – Blogger William K. Wolfrum today vowed to cease using emoticons on the Internet, in any way, ever again.

    “If feel that they had become an intruder into my soul,“ said Wolfrum, who also vowed to act more “High-Fallutin’“ in 2009. “In real life, I wink maybe twice a year. This is out of hand.’’

    Many critics have come forward to complain about Wolfrum`s decision, claiming he is often to self-important and vague in a lot of his satire.

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    Internet’s Top-3 Commenters in Nation announced by Prestigious Blog

    When I started my blog, it was because of my burning desire to affect change on a world troubled on a wide variety of fronts. Or it was because I had too much time on my hands and needed amusement. One of those.

    But something strange happened – no one came. For about a few year, I`d celebrate on days where I had 15 hits, even if 14 of them were me, logging on to different computers around the city so I could click my own Google Ads.

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    Tiger Woods SEO Tip

    Here`s the tip? Just mention Tiger Woods. And Elin. And Affairs. Toss in a helping of steroids, and Britney Spears (because you`re a rebel), and you`re in the money. It`s a new Tiger world we live in. Maybe we can pray it away.

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    Wine & the Arts: Raquel Arantes & Simone Bischoff – Genius I know

    Quite often, I sit around the house reflecting on my own genius. These are times of focused contemplation. They are also times that usually take, say, 42 seconds or so, ending in self recrimination and a modicum of depression.

    Because all I need to do is look toward my family to see true genius. Take for instance my Mother-in-Law Raquel Arantes and my cousin Simone Bischoff.

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    Barack Obama wishes all Americans a “New Year”

    WASHINGTON – President Barack Obama today officially wished all Americans a “New Year,” breaking with the tradition of U.S. Presidents wishing U.S. citizens a “Happy New Year.”

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    U.S. Officials: "Happy New Year" greetings likely originated in Yemen

    ITALY - Blogger William K. Wolfrum today sent Happy New Years greetings to all his friends, family and readers. Upon hearing this news, U.S. officials quickly surmised that the greeting likely originated in Yemen.

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    Overstalk.com CEO Patrick Byrne unveils new tool for curious investors

    Tired of not being able to know the secrets of those you obsess over? Want a closer look at those that have something you think can help divert attention from the awful truth?

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    Media is terrified of Patrick Byrne & Overstock.com’s anti-privacy activities

    Sometimes, as a journalist, blogger, or what have you, you come across a story you think has real meat on the bone. Such was my thinking when I saw that Patrick Byrne, CEO of Overstock.com, had been mining Facebook to create some type of “enemies list.” The list included business writers, bloggers, as well as the children and families of said writers and bloggers.

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    Overstock.com 'Spy' Larry Bergman & Hoax Martin Eisenstadt accused of illicit ‘Tater-Totting’ affair

    ITALY – In a land known for sordid romances, the latest romantic drama has people around the globe transfixed, as two great mythical characters have been linked together by noted blogger William K. Wolfrum.

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    Patrick Byrne and Overstock.com go Nixonian with "Enemies List"

    When the business you run can't make a profit, you fire auditors at a whim and the SEC just won't get off your ass, you might make some enemies. Such is the case of Overstock.com (OSTK) CEO Patrick Byrne. Byrne, however, is proactive about these types of things.

    So he made himself an enemies list. From Barry Ritholtz:

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    Boy, 8, pays bully to protect him - shocked when Bully turns on him

    TUPELO, Miss. - Little Timmy Johnson, 8, had been having trouble with bullies at his new school in Tupelo, Miss. Having moved with his family to Mississippi several months earlier, Johnson was treated disrespectfully by long-time students of Rumsfeld Grammar School.

    “Every day he’d show up with a black eye or with his lunch money stolen,” said Sally Johnson, Timmy’s mother. “We tried to get him to defend himself, but he was just overwhelmed by opposing forces that hated him for differing reasons.”

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    Santa Claus cancels Christmas due to poor investments - Elves still to receive massive bonuses

    NORTH POLE - In an announcement many had feared, Santa Claus announced that he would be sitting out Christmas 2009 due to massive inventory problems. The cancellation will include all children, regardless of naughtiness or niceness.

    “We have profit margins to deal with here, and this year has been just awful for us,” said Claus, who in 2006 moved his major toy making factories from the North Pole to the Mariana Islands. “We’ve always been bold at Santa Claus Industries (SCI), and this year it just didn’t work out.”

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    Sarah Palin hires Witch Doctor to remove Demons from Tiger Woods so we can all talk about Sarah Palin some more

    LA LA LAND - Former Alaska Governor and current multi-millionaire Sarah Palin, noting that she has received less attention in the past few days due to the scandals surrounding Tiger Woods, has announced that she will be hiring Kenyan Pastor Thomas Muthee - her personal witch doctor - to remove the demonic spirits from Woods.

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    Did Tiger Woods story go from amusing to tragic? Woman rushed from Woods' home on life support

    (FINAL UPDATE: According to People Magazine, the woman taken from Tiger Wood's home in an ambulance was his mother-in-law, Barbro Holmberg. Hospital spokesman Dan Yates told reporters that Holmberg, a well-known politician in Sweden, was admitted for stomach pain and is currently undergoing evaluation. He described her condition as stable. A family member also confirms that Holmberg is in stable condition and undergoing evaluation. -- WKW)

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    Barack Obama named Ultimate Fighter Season 10 Champion - Obama vs. Kimbo Slice bout in the works

    LAS VEGAS - In a shocking move by Ultimate Fighting Championship owner Dana White, President Barack Obama has been named the winner of Ultimate Fighter season 10, replacing Roy Nelson as this season’s winner.

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    Mike Finnigan - From jamming with Hendrix & Cocker to blogging with Amato

    Mike Finnigan is:

    A) A universally respected musician that has played with the likes of Jimi Hendrix and Etta James;

    B) A one-time player on the Kansas Jayhawks basketball team;

    C) A liberal d-list blogger’s best friend;

    D) The coolest cat you’ll ever know;

    E) Long-time Husband to Intervention`s Candy Finnigan

    F) All of the above.

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    The myth of Marco Rubio and GOP dominance of Twitter

    When Barack Obama began his more-or-less Keynesian approach to fixing a U.S. economy that was terribly broken by Milton Friedman`s rehashed laissez faire approach, two strange things happened amongst Republicans. First, Republicans began crowing about how they dominated social media web sites like Twitter - a meme primarily put out by Republicans. Second, every Republican in a state position immediately thrust themselves into the national political picture.

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    You can’t spell “Halliburton Professional” without “Rape”

    Today, the job market is in turmoil. Hard-working, clean-living Americans are finding themselves out of work and on unemployment lines. Families are suffering. Life is more of a struggle then ever.

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    Tiger Woods to do photo shoot for Playgirl

    SIMI VALLEY - Celebrated golfer Tiger Woods - in the midst of his biggest personal crisis - has announced that he will do a full photo shoot for Playgirl Magazine’s Christmas issue.

    “Tiger’s aware that he’s let down many of his fans recently,” said a spokeman for Woods. “We believe this photo shoot will remind people of just how impressive Tiger really is.”


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