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    Pope Benedict XVI takes over at Goldman Sachs

    By William K. Wolfrum on Tue, 04/20/2010 - 7:55pm | Business, Humor & Satire, Religion

    NEW YORK/ROME — Catholic Pope Benedict XVI has taken over all responsibilities at troubled Goldman Sachs, today. His new title will be Chief Holy Authority (CFA) or just “Pope.”

    The Pope will keep his duties with the Catholic Church while working simultaneously at Goldman Sachs. The Pope stated he saw no problems for the giant financial firm that is currently in trouble with the SEC.

    “We’ll move some people around, it will be fine,” said Pope.

    An unnamed official at Goldman Sachs said the hiring of the Pope was the aggressive move need to put the whole company at ease.

    “Let me tell you, with Benny, we’ll be just fine,” said the Goldman Sachs employee. “Some people got to go to Kansas, some to small Latin American countries. We’re good.”

    Goldman Sachs was down 12 percent on the news, as nervous investors want to see how this will all play out.

    –WKW

    Crossposted at William K. Wolfrum Chronicles

    Topics: 
    Business
    Humor & Satire
    Religion

    Comments

    Before they are shredded, the secret files of each parish, rectory, and even those of the Vatican must be open to law enforcement agents and investigative journalists. It will help remove the dark cloud that hangs over the Pope and his church. No pedophile should be left behind.

    by melvin polatnick (not verified) on Wed, 04/21/2010 - 7:42am

    I understand that the catholic churches files on their pedophiles will be opened to law enforcement only after they are shreded. This was told to me in strictest confidence by pope benedict yesterday, after his return from Malta.


    by Anonymous (not verified) on Wed, 04/21/2010 - 1:18pm