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    Mayor Rob Ford, Toronto, Too Fat to Smoke Rock

    By jollyroger on Sat, 06/01/2013 - 6:45am |
    I have become famous amongst my friends for my florid contempt for cocaine.

    So much so that when "chopping it up old school" they don't even bother to put out a line or two for me.

    It is overpriced and underpowered.

    I have snorted the red pharmaceutical ye-yo,  and I have smoked free base with Phaedra Grant (NSFW!!!) 

    I believe that when the cocaine comes ripping round the corner, speeding towards my brain, it takes one look at the accumulated body burden of years of amphetamine ingestion and simply crawls off into a corner whimpering.

    Still, it will.come as no surprise that I have known a crack fiend or two in my tme.

    The thing is,  they have been uniformly skinny.

    Mayor Ford is not.

    Ergo he cannot be seen on a video smoking crack.

    Case closed, Mr Mayor.

    What's that?

    Why, you are very welcome.

    Comments

    Ford says he has never smoked crack and he knows where the video is....huh? maybe its dust, not rock that he's smoking...

    by jollyroger on Sat, 06/01/2013 - 11:22am

    People showed up outside Ford’s office to heckle him with shouts (“take a drug test!”)

    by jollyroger on Mon, 06/03/2013 - 8:18am

    No hair sample was available from the Mayor's head... Expect a conversion to whatever religion Brittany Spears cited when she had all her body hair removed.

    by jollyroger on Mon, 06/03/2013 - 8:21am

    Phaedra wishes me to disclose that after she initiated me into the mysteries, of free-base I fucked her blind, so maybe there was some effect...

    by jollyroger on Mon, 06/03/2013 - 11:46am

    Cocaine messes around with your serotonin level - very much in a similar way to the SSRIs I obsessed about here for a good while.

    What this mayor is doing is cocaine mixed with bleach and all sorts of funky shit - and unlike President Obama or his predecessor, he is smoking the stuff while still in office. It's not unlikely that, especially if he's doing alot, the crack has alot to do with his bizarre comments.

    It's a weird world but I am genuinely surprised at this. Canadians and Canada usually put on a facade of a well kept, European style counterpart to America's madness.

    I also disagree with what you said about crack fiends - I knew some that are on the heavier side.


    by Orion on Thu, 06/06/2013 - 3:58am

    Maybe they just chew faster instead of that twitch thing...

    by jollyroger on Thu, 06/06/2013 - 8:28am

    Man, who knows...


    by Orion on Thu, 06/06/2013 - 11:59pm

    On the subject of bleach, I did know one scoundrel who, finding his regular inventory of rock depleted, busted up some Tidy Bowl cakes ( the white, not the blue...) and went back out to his regular. corner...Nasty! .

    by jollyroger on Fri, 06/07/2013 - 1:02am

    UPDATE: The cops have the video...the jig is up"


    by jollyroger on Fri, 11/01/2013 - 12:58pm

    Now losing in on the bench...

     

    http://talkingpointsmemo.com/dc/antonin-scalia-error-supreme-court-disse...


    by jollyroger on Thu, 05/01/2014 - 12:25am

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