Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Bewitching Jesus


    So, Saturday night the news was that Christine O'Donnell "dabbled into witchcraft" before becoming a hard-line evangelical Christian. And you know what? I wasn't surprised at all. Surely I wasn't surprised that a candidate like O'Donnell was attracted to the supernatural, since all of her politics are about magical thinking. I shrugged it off, and Sunday morning I went to church.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Sharia Law: The answer to all America's problems

    It’s time for Sharia Law to come to the United States. This nation has settled into a moral and economic funk that only a healthy dose of Sharia Law can fix.

    Oh sure, you’ve probably heard lots of bad things about Sharia Law. You probably think that it’s an Islamic plot to overthrow the world and control humanity. But this information – provided to you by the likes of Newt Gingrich – is based on ignorance and bigotry.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Anti-Muslims protest Mosque to be built on top of Mosque

    SEATTLE – “Do I need honor these people and pretend that they are worthy of the privileges of the First Amendment which I have in my gut the sense that they will abuse?” cried out Marty Peretz.

    “Where are the peaceful Muslims?! Where are the peaceful Muslims?” wrote Sarah Palin on her Facebook page.

    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Ask Tamburlaine: Burning Korans Is a Bad Idea

    Who on Earth is crazy enough to burn the Koran? Until two weeks ago, my answer has always been "raging lunatics in Elizabethan drama." You know, stage characters from the age of Shakespeare, the kind of people who are prone to cutting off their own hands, biting off their tongues and spitting them on the stage, or baking their enemies in pies and serving them for dinner. The people who make Hamlet seem well-adjusted. Certainly, I didn't think of it as the kind of thing real people did.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    God shoots himself in Wynn Las Vegas Hotel Room

    LAS VEGAS – The age old question – could God create a shotgun big enough to blow his own brains out? – has finally been answered. And that answer is, yes. Yes he can.

    God was found dead yesterday at the Wynn Las Vegas of a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    An American Boy

    I am kind, giving and strong. I am fair and law-abiding. I am smart and resourceful. I respect others and I do no harm. I follow the words of Jesus Christ. I am an American Boy.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Barack Obama Must Attend Westboro Baptist Church

    America faces few problems worse than where and when Barack Obama goes to church. Sure, there are environmental catastrophes to worry about, an economy that shows no interest in bouncing back, wars on God knows how many fronts and unemployment high enough to make Herbert Hoover cringe.

    But this is America. And Christ matters.

    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Dear Right Wing: Is This War or Not?

    How many times have we heard the phrase War on Terror over the last nine years? How many times have the very people who are now frothing and screaming about the Cordoba House community center (the alleged "Ground Zero Mosque") also screamed the words "War on Terror," and frothed at anyone who they felt was not acting (and I do mean acting) seriously enough about that "War?"

    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Undermining Traditional Marriage (Amen!)

    A judge has overturned California’s Proposition 8 as unconstitutional, because it is, and our country has moved one more step toward making marriage a universal right. Those who want marriage rights restricted will complain that this decision “undermines traditional marriage,” and in a way they’re correct. It does. And that's a good thing.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Ted Haggard over-repents, shooting past straight and right back to Gay

    COLORADO - Hours after admitting that his sexual liason with a male prostitute was a "massage gone awry," Ted Haggard has admitted he is again feeling Gay urges.

    "What can I say," said Haggard. "I over-repented and shot straight past being straight."

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    William K. Wolfrum’s Morning – July 19, 2010

    Breaking news

    Breaking News, American Style. Via Prosebeforehos.

    News/Politics

    Gulf Oil Disaster: The cap remains on British Petroleum’s oil geyser, but an apparent leak and “undetermined anomalies” mean the happy ending is still a long way off.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    God and the Oil Spill: A lack of leadership

    On April 20, 2010, British Petroleum’s Deep Water Horizon oil rig exploded, killing 11 men and allowing millions of gallons of oil to gush into the Gulf of Mexico. Almost immediately the call went out to him. Yet there was no reply.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Mojave Desert Cross is stolen! Atheists win! Christianity doomed

    This is just great news. Atheists around the world must be applauding the theft of the controversial Mojave Desert cross. This is a great moment for Atheists and the time is at hand to spread our lack of belief around the planet. The cross has been stolen, and it is a great sign.

    From Yahoo:

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Pope Benedict XVI takes over at Goldman Sachs

    NEW YORK/ROME — Catholic Pope Benedict XVI has taken over all responsibilities at troubled Goldman Sachs, today. His new title will be Chief Holy Authority (CFA) or just “Pope.”

    The Pope will keep his duties with the Catholic Church while working simultaneously at Goldman Sachs. The Pope stated he saw no problems for the giant financial firm that is currently in trouble with the SEC.

    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Why the Catholic Church Will Not Save Itself

    Every month, every week, the Catholic Church's scandal seems to deepen. Andrew Sullivan wants the Pope to resign. Christopher Hitchens wants the Pope arrested. Peggy Noonan has a brilliant column detailing the Catholic hierarchy's inability to grasp the problem and calling for "new blood" in the leadership. These are all reasonable desires. But none of that will happen.

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