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William K. Wolfrum's picture

Minn. woman sees Michele Bachmann manifest on bottom of iron

MINNESOTA - Putting away laundry was the last place a Minnesota woman thought she’d have a spiritual moment. But there it was: an image she saw as a manifestation of Michele Bachman on the bottom of her iron.

William K. Wolfrum's picture

Intervention's Candy Finnigan - the last drink's on her at A&E's hit show

After a lifetime of being casual about her appearance, Candy Finnigan - one of three Interventionists on the hit Reality show “Intervention” (which debuts its new season tonight on A&E, Nov. 30 8/9c) - has learned that fame can make you change your perspective.

William K. Wolfrum's picture

Tiger Woods crashes White House Party as Sarah Palin & Levi fight - All your time-wasting stories mashed into one

AMERICA - Golfer Tiger Woods crashed his Escalade into a White House Party yesterday, stopping long enough to get his picture taken with President Barack Obama before getting cracked in the mouth with a three-wood by his wife Elin.

William K. Wolfrum's picture

Tiger Woods has car accident - time to use Glenn Beck Logic

When I first saw that Tiger Woods had been in a car accident, I thought, how great, he's just an idiot like one of us. After all, he was just fine, his ego likely hurt more than his body.

William K. Wolfrum's picture

Report: Everyone to be Comically Tasered by Year 2015

PORTLAND, Maine - A new report from the Wolfrum Alpha Resource Center states that every man, woman and child will be tasered at least once by the year 2015. Most of the taserings will be quite comical.

“Soon, we’ll reach a point where everyone will have their own taser gun,” said Portland Sheriff Calvin Jarmen. “Then, just sit back and laugh.”

William K. Wolfrum's picture

Pardon these Turkeys

Pardon me and these turkey headlines …

… Barack Obama to refuse Pardoning Thanksgiving Turkey, will instead send it to NYC for trial.

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… Barack Obama to wait to pardon Thanksgiving turkey until it reveals its real birth certificate.

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… Barack Obama to pardon Thanksgiving Turkey, but only after mandating it to buy insurance from CIGNA first.

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William K. Wolfrum's picture

Multiple Senators hospitalized after obstructing bathroom visits

WASHINGTON - Nearly 50 Senators suffered embarrassing internal injuries this afternoon, after Republican Senators - joined by moderate Democratic Senators - obstructed the Senate’s new bathroom rules.

William K. Wolfrum's picture

Report: Americans tired of ‘Change We Can Believe In,’ demand new catch phrase

KANSAS - A stunning new poll from the Taibbi Research Center shows that the vast majority of Americans are now tired of President Barack Obama’s mottos of “Change We Can Believe In,” and other Change-based catch phrases. Nearly 80 percent of those surveyed said that the “Change” motto had grown tired and they needed something new.

William K. Wolfrum's picture

CharlesKrauthammerBeingCondescendingTowardMeaphobia strikes David Gregory?

Rumors have been circulating that “Meet the Press” host David Gregory suffers from the rare and stupid condition: CharlesKrauthammerBeingCondescendingTowardMeaphobia.

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William K. Wolfrum's picture

Blogger: "Sarah Palin will always be funny. Always!"

INTERNET - In a rare follow-up to one of his own blog posts, noted Blogger William K. Wolfrum attacked those that have criticized him for leaning too heavily on Sarah Palin for humor.

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