Maiello: Human Rights and the Stock Market
Doc Cleveland: Fear Itself: Ukraine Edition
And on a Lighter Note, CPAC Starts Today!
My friends, the 2012 U.S. elections are the most important of our lives. Which is why you should give me money.
Yes, my friends, it is that time again – the time for you to decide how much you love your country by giving money to a U.S. blogger residing in Brazil. As has been proven time and again, my words reverberate around the globe and give President Barack Obama a distinct edge in his race against humanoid life form Mitt Romney. For instance, when I tweeted this:
Remember: The Republican who is now telling you Romney is right will be saying Romney lost because he “isn’t a real conservative” on Nov. 7. [Read more]
WASHINGTON – In its last action before recess, GOP representatives passed a bill through the House that would require President Barack Obama to send a personal letter to Al Qaeda leaders, requesting a large terrorist attack on a blue state of the U.S. in late-October. The bill passed across party lines.
“We feel that a large-scale terrorist attack on the U.S. and its citizens is just what America needs right now,” said Speaker of the House John Boehner. “Just one devastating attack would be the end of this President, meaning lower taxes and more jobs would be on the way.” [Read more]
DES MOINES – Appearing together on stage for the first time, Republican Presidential nominee Mitt Romney and former Vice-Presidential nominee Sarah Palin had harsh words for the administration of President Barack Obama.
“By even mentioning that he did not like an anti-Muslim video, Obama has put all Americans in grave danger,” said Romney, smirking. “And when I say Americans, I’m not including troops overseas, because I’m only talking about important things in this speech.”
Romney added that all speech of all types must be free, lest the United States become a totalitarian dictatorship. [Read more]
WASHINGTON – The re-election campaign for President Barack Obama has made a $1 million donation to the Mitt Romney campaign. The donation comes on the heels of Romney’s recent foray into foreign affairs, accusing Obama of sympathizing with Islamic extremists, despite the fact that it never happened.
Sources close to the Obama campaign said they wanted to make the donation to give Romney more chances to appear on television so voters could see more of him. [Read more]
Today is the 11th anniversary of the 9/11 terrorist attacks on the United States. It is a day for remembrance of those who lost their lives and loved ones. And it’s a day to remember those who have used 9/11 to advance their own political agendas:
“I know in your mind, you can think of the times America was attacked. One is Dec. 7, that’s Pearl Harbor Day. The other is Sept. 11, and that’s the day the terrorists attacked. I want you to remember Aug. 1, 2012, the attack on our religious freedom. That is a day that will live in infamy, along with those other dates.” — Rep. Mike Kelly R-Pa. [Read more]
It has been several months since I, William K. Wolfrum, formally declared my intention to run for the office that I deserve to win. Since then, I have had multiple donors who have helped me spread my message across this great land.
My message is built on simplicity – I deserve to be elected to the office that I want to win. There are multiple reasons why I feel deserving. For one, I love America. Truly love it. I believe America is the greatest county in the history of countries. More than that, it is better than the nomadic tribes that preceded countries. America is just a kick-ass country and I love it. America is where dreams happen. Which is why I deserve to be elected to that office that I want. [Read more]
Over the years, William K. Wolfrum has made numerous outlandish claims in blogs, on Twitter, in real life and occasionally while sleeping. Such claims demand non-partisan fact-checking to give the public the truth of the matter. That is why I, William K. Wolfrum, have taken it upon myself to fact-check some of these claims. [Read more]
HEAVEN – God, the controversial creator of everything everywhere, has signed a new deal with the Democratic Party that will keep him in their fold for the next four years.
“This is just a thrill,” said God, 42. “There so much uncertainty in this game, but now I feel as though I’ve finally made it.” [Read more]
Yes, Bin Laden is alive and well in Brazil, where he’s running for office in the mid-term elections. His political aims? Apparently disillusioned by Jihad following his Pakistan bullet adventure, he is running to rid the nation of corruption and child labor. It’s a big move for Osama, who once made a living in Brazil in the bug extermination business.
Brazilians aren’t at all fearful of Bin Laden, and for good reason. They have Batman and Robin to protect them. [Read more]