SarahPalinGrrrrl's blog

DONT TELL SARAH WHAT TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SarahPalinGrrrrl — Wed, 11 Aug 2010 02:24:04 +0000

ok i wasnt going to write stuff here anymore b/c your all are WAY TOO LAME but then everyone started totally FREAKING OUT b/c some DUMBASS TEACHER dissed SARAH for not being governor of alaska anymore so i had to stand up for my GRRRRRRRLFRIEND SARAH!!!!!!!!

ok first i dont know why everyone gives a care what some teacher says b/c everyone knows that teachers are SOCIALISTS!!! and thats why i skip all the time b/c the only real school is LIFE!!!!!! and once a teacher tried to say in my class when i didnt skip that taxes are to pay for the government and that is totally the most SOCIALIST THING THAT I HAVE HEARD EVERRRRRRRR!!!!!!!

and second of all everyone knows that its totally chill to quit something if its for something else thats cooler. like when i played did the clarinet when i was a freshman but then i got on the CHEERLEADERS!!!!!! and then everyone on the band was totally mad b/c it was right before the concert and then they had to get gina mcgeeper to do the clarinet but she messed everything up and i LMAO at the stupid concert but i didnt give a care b/c i was already a CHEERLEADER!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!! and thats like what SARAH is now except that she is even more popular than a CHEERLEADER bc the WHOLE WORLD cares about everything she says bc she is the COOLEST PERSON IN THE WHOLE WORLD!!!!!!!

and thats why that FAT NERD teacher is just jealous of sarah b/c she is just some dumb teacher in alaska and sarah is going to be THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES!!!! GOOOOOOOOOOOO SARAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Topics:

Politics

Humor & Satire

LEVI JOHNSTON IS A PLAYGIRL PERV

SarahPalinGrrrrl — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 20:19:09 +0000

so my ex-boycrush is a expositionist perv. its cool. i'm not like some dumbass kid. i get that sometimes people have to do stuff for money and sometimes that means that u have to be naked in a magazine so millions of homopervs can wacketywackwack themselfs to a pic of ur beautiful love-noodle.

OMG i just totally threw up outside my mouth but it was a dry heave so nothing came out except my lost innocence and a gumwad

before when levi made up all that stuff about sarah in vanity UNfair i was so MAD that i ripped up all his pics in my locker and my bedroom and on my folders and my notebooks and the one under my pillow. and then i burned all the scraps with a lighter but they didn't light so i put nailpolish remover on them and then my homework got on fire and my mom grounded me for two weeks which TOTALLY sucked b/c my room stank like burnt nail polish remover.

but now i just feel SAD b/c i know now that levi is mental. that's what happens in america when u stand for something. i started watching glenn beck b/c sarah said to and i know that he's super smart b/c he's a total nerd and nerds are smart. and glenn beck said that the goverment can go into ur computer if u buy a car and control ur mind. and that's what happened to levi. the goverment made him go crazy and turn into a perv. and they tried to do it sarah but she's too tough so they had to do it to levi instead. and i think that they r trying to do it to me too b/c sometimes i think perv things about barack obama even tho i would never ever go there b/c of sarah. so thats how i know that the goverment is making me think it. but its hard b/c the goverment is so powerful that sometimes i can't stop thinking about obama. the goverment even made glenn beck go crazy once.

but at least glenn's not naked in a homoperv magazine

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Politics

Humor & Satire

SHHHEEEEEEEEEE's BAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SarahPalinGrrrrl — Sat, 08 Aug 2009 16:06:06 +0000

ha ha ha ha ha ha. all the dumbasses were like sarah is done cuz she isnt the leader of alaska anymore and she's gonna like disappear or something. DOH!!!!!!! she showed them!!! LOLOLOLOLOL! cuz now she said obama ben lodden's healthy plan is EVIL and EVERYBODY IS TOTALLY LISTENING TO HER!!!!!!

its like when joey dingman got kicked out of school for selling and everyone was like oh he's so gone we're never gonna see that dude again. but he's always like hanging out after school and we all chill with him still. know why???? cuz he has what we need!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and thats how it is with sarah. she has what we need! THE TRUTH!!!!!!!! cuz everyone else is too afraid to tell THE TRUTH!!!!!! but sarah's not afraid of ANYTHING!!!!!! she knows that evil obama wants to kill all the old white people and when she tells cold hard truth everyone has to hear it! even the liberal news people have to write about it even tho THEY CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!! BECAUSE THE PEOPLE ARE LISTENING!!!!

and i just want to say that even tho old people creep me out and i got grounded last week for calling my grandma a ho, i still don't think that they should have to die or anything!

anyway this is just the start. sarah is going to say a LOT LOT LOT of true sh-t from now on and so soon everyone will know how evil obamabobama really is and then he will lose in the next election and then guess who wins???????!!!!???!!!??????

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SARAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Topics:

Politics

Humor & Satire

How come levi is talking trash about sarah palin?

SarahPalinGrrrrl — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 14:12:21 +0000

Hi everyone!!!!!!! i wrote a letter to sarah palin on tues but she hasn't answered yet but i know that she will becuz she appreciates her grrrrlfriends!!!!!

so i read today that levi is saying some sh-t about how sarah quit becuz she wants lots of money and i was REALLY REALLY MAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i can't believe that i used to have a crush on that little ASS-WEENY!!!!!! first he's like DOH NO CONDOM DUMBASS!!!! then he goes all splitsville on bristol as soon as the election is over and she has to raise a kid ALL BY HERSELF!!!! and she's like only 18!!!!! have u ever seen a dirty diaper? i saw one once when i was helping my ex-friend ashley babysit and i totally had to PUKE!!!!

but anyway i learned from sarah that if u want to be successful you have to think stuff with ur brain sometimes and that's why i was thinking about levi. he kind of effed up sarahs election when he didn't use a condom don't u think? and everyone started saying sh-t about bristol and how sarah was a bad mom? and then now he saying crap about how sarah only quit becuz she wants money so that she can't win when she runs as president!!!!

WTF??????? i think that the democrats are PAYING levi to make bristol pregnant and say sh-t about sarah!!!!!!! there should TOTALLY be an investigation of levi and then he should get waterboreded and then he would cry like a baby and wet his pants and confess who made him get bristol pregnant!!!!!! and sarah will be totally vindified and be THE NEXT PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES!!!! YAYYYYYY!!!!!!

GOOOOOOOOOOOO SARAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Topics:

Politics

Humor & Satire

DEAR SARAH PALIN: just say no to the haters!!!!!!!

SarahPalinGrrrrl — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 18:23:32 +0000

DEAR SARAH PALIN,

i am writing 2u becuz i have been reading lots of stuff from media dorks who hate u becuz ur beautiful and successful .

i am beautiful too and i hope that one day i will be super successful like u but first i have to graduate high school. i know that u are SUPER TUFF AND COOL and u don't care what those assbrains think but sometimes its hard when everyone is saying sh-t about you. like when ashley MEGABITCH schneider said that i slept with kurt hanson and then everyone said i was a slut and some ASSBITCH wrote HO on my locker even tho i didn't go all the way . but people don't care about the TRUTH!!!!!!!! they just want to say sh-t becuz they think other people will think they r cool.

anyway i am trying to be strong like u but sometimes u just need a grrrrlfriend to say like U R THE BEST, GRRRRRL!!!!!!! so that's why i'm writing becuz u r like a grrrrlfriend to me even tho u don't know me and i know that U R THE BEST!!!!! i'm also thinking lots and lots of positive thoughts and i know that u can feel them so that's also why i'm writing this letter so that you know where all the positive energy is coming from. but i had to save a little positive energy for myself becuz of the locker incident and becuz my bitch-from-hell teacher mrs. carmichael gave me an F on my book report about ur biography becuz she said i can't do a book report for a book except if its already written. but that's stupid becuz i know what it's going to be about anyway. and guess what?!?!?!?!?!?!? she gave NERDBOY wally lipschitz an A+ becuz he wrote about obama's book and that just proves that she's racist against alaska people!!!!!!!!!!

but also u shouldn't worry about what people say becuz they r full of HATE!!!!!! that's becuz they r ugly nerds like wally and when they were in high school people used to flush their heads in the toilet and stuff. and then they all went to SNOBVILLE colleges and they pretended that they weren't nerds anymore but they were still nerds only everyone they were with were nerds too. so then when a HOT GRRRRL like u who didn't go to SNOB U. and who got kicked out of college one or two times and who totally won a beauty contest WAS ALMOST THE VICE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, they're just TOTALLY jealous inside and they say mean stuff becuz they're just mad about all the chocolate swirlies they had in school. like that MEGADORK david loserman. u can tell that he was that annoying nerd who always made dumb jokes in global studies and he prolly got swirlied six times a day like he was getting waterbored or something but totally grosser!!!!

also don't listen to those NERDASSES who say that ur a quitter just becuz u only were governor for 2 and a half years. they r just stuck in their convention thinking that governors have to be for 4 years. DUHHH!!! u have lots and lots of important things to do for the country like to find someone who can write ur book with u so then i can write a book report for real. and also u have to run for PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES becoz even though its not yet u have to study first!!!!

so i have to go now becuz miley cyrus said that she was sad on twitter so i have to send her some positive energy but i will send u more tomorrow so be ready.

YOUR BEST FRIEND EVRRRRRR!!! HUGS OOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOO,

SARAHPALINGRRRRL!!!!!!!!!

ps i made a sarah palin tribute page with all the best videos of u EVRRRR!!! i know that u will LOVE IT!!!

GOOOOOOOO SARRRRRRRAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!

Topics:

Politics

Humor & Satire

I HATE YOU DAVID LETTERMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SarahPalinGrrrrl — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 19:32:18 +0000

dear mr. david lecherman...i mean letterman !!!!!

u are the creepiest perv EVERRRRRRRRRRR!!! except for maybe this freak . he's like a 15 out of 10 on the perv scale and ur like 14.5. LOLOLOLOL!!!! ur even worse than my math teacher mr arnack who has hair totally coming out of his ears and his nose and once i found a booger on my paper that i got back from him and almost totally puked my guts out. and then i made my friend joshua burn the paper with gasoline but the grass got on fire and joshua's hair got burned and stank for a week.

anyway, mr. david letterman, ur creepy and stupid and none of my friends EVER watch you and the only reason that i know about your creepy pukoramic video is because its on lena-the-liberal-loser's facebook page. when i saw it i totally UNfriended her for like 6 hours but then i had to friend her again to see if kurt hanson (xoxoxoxoxox) wrote on her wall. so then i had to watch ur video again even tho it makes me gag. i'm putting it here so that u can see how totally CREEPY u look like when u talk about having sex with sarah palin's 14-year-old daughter!!!!!!!

guess what mr. lecherman, U R NOT FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!! the only person who is less funny than u is that bald dork on ur show who always kisses ur old wrinkly ass. LOLOLOLOL!!!! ur like the two old guys on the muppets who who think that ur funny but ur just dumb old farts. why don't u move to ass-achusetts and get married!!! LOLOLOLOL!!!!!!

here is the other one where u call sarah a slut!!!!!!!!! sarah is totally not a slut. she and todd are totally in LOVE and she would never do it with anyone else ever except if she has to for world peace after she is president. you are just jealous b/c sarah is totally hot and u r a wrinkly OLD MAN !!!!! when sarah is president she will totally BAN UR SHOW but no one will care and then u will be on "i'm a celebrity, get me out of here" and u and the bald guy will have to eat dogsh-t and stuff and then u will still lose. LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and here is the one after sarah kicked ur wrinkly ass and u had to apologize to the whole world and now everyone knows that you are a creepy pervy perv and no one will ever watch ur show ever again!!!!!!

HAHAHAHAHA!!!! SHE TOTALLY SHOWED YOU!!!!!!! GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SARAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2012!!!!! YAYYYYYYY!!!!!

xxx ooo,

SPG

ps if u r not too wussy then i would totally go on ur show and say this to ur face and you would try to make some dumb joke but everyone would boo because u r so not funny and then i would be hired to be a HOT politics commenter on FOX NEWS !!!!!! here is where u can see what an AWESOME politics commenter i am!!!!!

Topics:

Politics

RUSSIA PEOPLE ARE SCARY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SarahPalinGrrrrl — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 16:08:00 +0000

O. M. G!!!!!! my friend just sent me this video. it's like these REALLY CREEPY russia guys who are totally spying on sarah from inside their country. if i were her, i'd totally get a retraining order on them. i'd never be brave enough as sarah to be neighbors with creepy russia people. when she's the VP, i bet she'll totally BLOW UP THEIR HOUSE--OOPS, SO SORRY!!!

even though its way too creepy, i still put it on my on SARAH PALIN TRIBUTE PAGE.

Topics:

Politics

GRRRRLS NEED CLOTHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SarahPalinGrrrrl — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 21:58:02 +0000

OMG!!!! i don't know what the big deal is about sarah spending lots of money on clothes! grrrrls like sarah and me need clothes b/c we totally have to look hot to be popular. like last year my EX-friend cara nut was running for homecoming queen but then she wore this totally slutty miniskirt with ripped fishnets and then everyone said she was a slut and she lost to jenny weiner who's like a total cow. and then no one was friends with her anymore and she was like in social siberia (thats where governor putin lives next to alaska, i looked it up!!!!!). when i run for homecoming queen next year, i'm totally going to max out my credit cards b/c i have to win for my political career. i know i promised to cut up my credit cards when i did my live debate blogging and sarah said that we can't live outside our means or whatever because the country is depressed. but i'm not a hippocrit because that was before i remembered that i had to be the homecoming queen next year!

besides, sarah already saved the country lots and lots of money because she sold her airplane and she cooks all the food for her family and she gave back a bridge to the government that cost like a million dollars, so i think it's totally cool for her to spend some money that she saved on nice stuff. besides, americans will never vote for her if she looks like trailer trash because everyone knows that even tho u have to pretend to not be rich to be the vice president, you still have to have class like sarah does. and u totally can't have class if u shop at walmart. and besides, i remember that some democrat dude got a really expensive haircut and nobody gave a care even though he's a dude. since sarah is a grrrrl, she should get to spend like a hundred times more than him b/c it's more expensive for grrrrls.

so that means that all u LOSERS should LEAVE SARAH ALONE!!!!!!! u just wish that u could be her b/c she's so much cooler, but u can never be her b/c u probably shop at walmart and wear the ugliest clothes EVERRRRRRR!!!!

GOOOOOOOOO SARAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PS this is my new song for sarah and me, even though its really old it's still cool

Topics:

Politics

Humor & Satire

FREE SARAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SarahPalinGrrrrl — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 17:15:06 +0000

HI EVERYBODY!!!! i'm iphone blogging in chemistry class. i keep clicking the wrong EFFING LETTERS b/c my of nails. but i had to write b/c i just read that SARAH IS IN TROUBLE!!!!!!!! on this website it says that some EVIL BITCH from who works for john mccain tried to not let her talk to reporters. i think maybe john mccain is holding sarah HOSTAGE b/c he's a sexist!!!! i think maybe she needs our help!!!!! so if u see sarah this is what us have to do. first u have to create a divergence. usually i just pull the fire alarm but u can also get ur friend to scream really loud about how OBAMA IS A TERRORIST. but maybe that won't work b/c there are too many people already doing that. so just do the fire alarm. then everyone will run out and when their running, u need to tell sarah to come with u. then we have to find a place to put her. SHE CAN TOTALLY STAY UNDER MY BED!!!! and we can talk girl stuff together at night. and then she can come to school with me and we can pretend that she's a foreign exchange student from the north pole. LOLOLOL!!!! plus she can help me with my homework b/c she's really smart, especially in geography!!!! and then everyone will be worried about sarah and wonder where she went and THEN right before the election, she'll tell the WHOLE SCHOOL who she really is and all the reporters will come and she'll give an AWESOME SPEECH and answer A MILLION questions and tell everyone what happened. and then john mccain will be totally ARRESTED FOR KIDNAPPING and so it will be SARAH AGAINST OBAMA in the election and sarah will TOTALLY WINNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!! YAAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!

oh shit. here comes my chemistry teacher. free sarah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Topics:

Politics

Humor & Satire

ANYONE CAN BE VP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SarahPalinGrrrrl — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 00:46:18 +0000

OMG!!! my friend just sent me the AWESOMEST VIDEO for my SARAH PALIN TRIBUTE PAGE!!!!

its a song about how sarah proved how anyone can be the VP even if u flunked in college but ur still totally smart. thats why she's a total INSPIRATION to me !!!!! theres a totally GROSS part when john mccain dies but thats what might happen and then SARAH WOULD BE THE PRESIDENT!!! even though i know she would be really, really about john mccain. i already put it on my tribute page. if you haven't seen it you totally have to check it out b/c i have every video that was ever made about sarah specially all the ones from SNL and some more AWESOME songs and other stuff. XXX OOOO SarahPalinGrrrrl

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Humor & Satire