For me, this summer started with my mother's death. It's ending with daily reminders of just how far some will go to prevent benefit to the many at the expense of profit to the few.

For months, Republicans have been saying anything they think will elicit fear, a powerful agent against change. Creating fear and confusion is the swiftest way to get people to act against their own interests. But, as usual, the fear and confusion they seek to sow is dishonest, disingenuous, and disrespectful.

Because of the suggestion that health care reform will include "death panels" who will decide how and when each of us will die, coverage for end of life decision-making may be stripped from the health care reform bill, which is simply ridiculous. 

One day, when I was 19 years old, my mother called. I sat in my college dorm room and listened to her tell me that she and my step-father had drawn up living wills with very specific instructions. She told me that my uncle had been made executor. I protested that I wasn't a child and that, if the worst happened, I would be able to take care of things. My mom's simple answer then was that she knew I wasn't a child, but that they didn't trust me to carry out their wishes. I had to admit that she had a point. How would I, so young and so ignorant about death, be able to tell a doctor not to use all means possible to try to save them? 

Lucky for us all, they didn't get into some horrific car crash that claimed both of them at the same time. But my mom did get sick and at a certain point in the course of her illness, I became her guardian, responsible for decisions about her care. The nursing home makes you sign lots of papers. They ask a lot of questions about what measures should be taken at the end. I answered for my mom. I knew what she wanted because she'd had the foresight to make it clear, and in my late 30s, I was able to respect her wishes over my own needs.

In thinking about the end, as I did many times over the past few years, I always imagined it would come when mom forgot how to swallow. That would be it. There would be no feeding tube, and she would just fade away.

It didn't end up happening that way. They went in to get her out of bed one morning and she wasn't looking good. They called me to tell me that she was having trouble breathing and her color was gray. I started to cry. Then, they asked me the question they had to ask, even though it had been talked about over and over, and put into writing. Do you want us to send her to the hospital or just make her comfortable?  In that moment, when I told them to make her comfortable, I was telling them to let my mom die. It felt like my whole middle was gone. I couldn't breathe. The sound coming out of me can only be described as keening. 

That was, to date, the absolute worst moment of my life. Worse even than the moment a few hours later, when I held her hand and felt her take her last breath. Had I not known what my mother wanted, how she wanted to die, I would have never been able to make the decision in the moment. I would have sent her to the hospital, where I likely would have watched her lie there, filled with tubes, kept alive by machines, for who knows how long.

It's not easy, death. It's not easy to think about or to talk about. It is immensely comforting to have kind, caring professionals help a family through the process of making those end-of-life decisions. 

For the Republicans to turn it into something it is not--a group of nefarious government officials deciding who lives and who dies--in order to benefit their political agenda, is crass and it is cruel. As convinced as I am that no politician cares about me as an individual, I would at least like to think that some of them still have a shred of human decency left that would prevent them from distorting the very real and very painful experiences that every family goes through when a loved one is dying. I would like to think that, but I don't.

Republicans are lying with one single intent: to kill health care reform. Instead of standing up to them and risking reelection campaigns, democrats are seemingly willing to dismantle the bill, one piece at a time, until it does nothing.

Just another day in Washington.