Have you been feeling "fuzzy" lately? Blinded by passion? Addled by rage? Do you find yourself ranting about MSM unfairness and the well-known bias of certain TPM staffers? (I won't name any names but it rhymes with "Breg Bargent".) Do you hurl potted plants at your television or periodically spit on your monitor? Do you pound the "recommend" button manically when you see an anti-Hillary post, even though it only works the first time? Have your purchased five or more computers so that you can vent your anger through multiple recommendations?

You might be suffering from Hillaria. This dangerous disease has now been exposed by a brilliant expose at Daily Kos: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2008/4/29/75840/7712/999/505469. According to the article, in 2007, the Clinton campaign's Secret Opposition Research Division In Detroit (SORDID), developed a deadly new virus designed to blunt the wits of Obama supporters. Pretending to offer skin-whitening treatment, SORDID experimented on thousands of unsuspecting Detroiters of color, including the Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick. CDC experts have blamed the virus for the reversal of Detroit's meager economic gains in recent years, as well as a number of asinine text messages that Mayor Kilpatrick sent to lover Christine Beatty.

The virus targets the amygdala, the emotional center of brain, heightening feelings of anger, while at the same time interfering with neural connections in the cerebral cortex. Hillaria victims are prone to bouts of rage, hyperventilation, and excessive application of capital leters. In advanced stages, it can lead to foaming at the mouth and melanomic changes. Victims' skins often taken on a greenish color, leading some to call Hillaria, "Troll's Disease".

For reasons unknown, the virus only targets supporters of Barack Obama, although the CDC is concerned that it could leap to supporters of John McCain should Clinton win the Democratic nomination. While the specific transfer mechanism is unknown, the disease appears to spread through Internet blogs. If so, this would be the first time that a real virus has been transmitted virtually. Among blog communities at Talking Points Memo and Daily Kos, the disease appears to have reached epidemic proportions, and the CDC may soon impement quarantines of these sites. If you suspect that you have contracted the disease, CDC advises you to turn off your computer immediately and avoid news sources for at least three weeks. Without stimulus, the virus can be destroyed by the body's natural defenses, but it may remain dormant for several months, so victims should continue to take precautions until September.