God gave men language so that they could conceal their thoughts from each other. I think that’s a deep observation about the role of language in communication.

Tallleyrand)

I am doing it again, I keep sayin I aint gonna do it; but what is a mother to do?

Another Christmas, and I get to see my son four days in a week; and the marvels of it all.

Sean has always come to see me three times a year over the last ten years.

But since he met this woman who has family up here, I have gotten to see him four times a year.

This woman is magic and has given me two granddaughters and I am always amazed.

But it is the story or stories.

His in-laws always have spectacular Christmases.

This year 25 people show up at this Christmas Spectacular including eight children.

I see Seany before and after the event.

There is this grand tree and the adults announce prizes like one would see on the Price is Right.

Somewhere along the line, an uncle yells out for Noela.

And there is this huge present.

And according to Sean, Noela stands up and cries:

THAT'S ME, THAT'S ME AND THIS IS MINE.

Hahahahahahhaha

I swear that it is just in the last two months, (I confirmed this fact with Sean's Mother-In-Law) that Noela just began spewing out words like a volcano spews out lava.

When I met her this time at the car she says:

Hi Pop, I know you are Daddy's daddy.

She still does not like me so much.

And I am sure Sean or his bride kept saying this line during the 30 mile ride over here.

But damn, I think she is getting the idea.

In the Spring, when I get to see her again, I will ask her what her last name is and I will ask her what her Daddy's last name is and then I will go into some rant suitable to children. Hahahahah

Anyway, as the story goes, the little brat had announced that she desired three things for Christmas:

A doll

Candy

And a race car?

WHAT?

I was astounded and confounded.

Sean is not a NASCAR guy and neither is his wife.

Where in the hell did she get this idea?

But it just elated me.

Gender specific is not on my radar screen.

I cannot ever take the time to watch nuts driving on some oval lane turning left for four hours; especially because 90% of all the fans are repubs!

You will not believe this.

But one of Noela's uncles provided this huge package and following Noela's strange reaction was this gem; it was like something out of The Price is Right:

NOELA, COME ON DOWN!

I AM NOELA, I AM NOELA (HOLDING UP HER HANDS) IT'S MINE, IT'S MINE.....hahhahaah

I was thinking that if someone gave a 30 month-old a race care....well it would be some small model, it might even move.

The little bugger attacks the wrapping and finds this race car that she can sit in and drive.

30 months?

And she can drive?

And there is a battery and a button to turn the goddamn thing on, and this little girl is in heaven.

You cannot get a miniature golf cart for under $300.00; can you?

There were so many presents that were given to my son and his family that they cannot take them home. There is no room in the car.

That is another thing that I have forgotten.

It takes an hour or more to just load up the car, change the diapers and then get the kids into their car seats.

With diapers and wipes and the parent's clothing and necessities as well as car seats and....

It takes three hours and more just to drive home; except you have to add an hour or more because mom and dad have to stop to feed these babies and change and STOP THE CRYING on the way home.

Anyway, THE FAMILY will send representatives to the Cities in the next few weeks or so with the single purpose of delivering all these presents to the Day Family. Hahahahah

And, I have to underline, none of these In-Laws (great word isn't it?) is a member of the 1% or 10% or even the 20%!

And there is no Leave It To Beaver here.

There are many family struggles and divorces and such involved in these families.

But damn! All these adults just forgot all that crap and gather together for their family.

Where did all the resentments go?

Where did all the bad memories go?

Where did all the hatred go?

Do you know what I would have given thirty years ago to give my daughter and son a miniature golf cart labeled a race car?

There is no business relationship between these folks and my kids.

I am astounded.

I asked Seany, where in the hell will you permit Noela to drive a racecar? Hhahahahah

The back yard, fenced in is all I could come up with. And you cannot even do that in his backyard until the snow is gone.

You know, we are not speaking about power. I mean the little vehicle will never approach 1 o two  miles an hour for chrissakes. Hahahah

I am astounded.

Can you imagine going to some Christmas thing and there are so many presents you cannot take them home with you?

hahahahahah

All the other kids received fine gifts, but this was one BIG CHRISTMAS compared to what other Americans experience.

THESE ARE NICE PEOPLE.

And I guess some of them are gun nuts (we are in Northern Minnesota for heavens sake) and there are anti-union people up here (even though most of our population are dems) and there are religious nuts and.....

But family is a big big deal and there is no pretense about it.

Forget politics for a sec (like I am able to do that)

I just have never witnessed anything like this in my life, even though what I write is second hand.

A thirty month old girl, who has only really began to speak English over the last couple months, is given a car? Hhhahahahahahah

And none of these people are rich.

This would be a great start for a Steven King novel. ahhaahahahha

I mean my son could learn that the family members are all evil demons. hahahaha

All that aside...

I told my son that the real revelation here involves my granddaughter and her dreams.

I would like a fake oven.

I would like a Barbie Doll.

I would like a Tiara.

I would like a pink Teddy Bear?

I WOULD LIKE A RACE CAR?

Of course my son and I had wonderful times this past week.

Do you know that he actually watched some Harry Potter flick with me?

Now calm down, we did watch Patton and Louie and other obscene things for chrissakes. Hhahahaha

But I have never witnessed a Christmas like this, second handedly of course for the most part, in my life.

My son and I had a great time together.

His wife was extremely nice to me.

The grandkids are healthy and happy.

It was wonderful for this old codger.

My son and I got to swear and talk about obscene things and....

It was great.

I do not think I will get in trouble for writing this post, but I aint sending this out in email to my son or daughter. Hahahahaha

Seany claims he hits this blog just to read me once in awhile, but I think this only occurs when I alert him. hhahahah

There are so many thoughts about Christmas and family and gender and the age of children and....

It has been an amazing week.

THE END

BABY IT'S COLD OUTSIDE