The Decider's picture

    The Polls Are Rigged!

    You can read about it right here!

    This is what is going on, America.  The pollstakers are asking their pollstakees whether they are Republican or Democrat. Then, they are only taking the polls of certain numbers of each. The trouble is, the numbers they are using is based upon the number of democrats that voted years and years ago before I colored the country red.

    The experts claim that this practice is valid and reliable but that is bull. The so called "experts" are college statisticians which, as we all know, are liberal. Even Fox News employs experts so it has infected their polls as well.

    This is a democrat plot to steal the election by convincing real Americans that it is hopeless to come out and vote. Talk about voter supression!  Only in Obama's version of America can you get away with this.

    I believe the long term solution is to train statisticians at conservative Universities like Liberty U., Abilene Christian U., ORU, College of the Ozarks and Tarrant County College. Then, we will pressure the elite media to balance themselves by hiring statisticians who are conservative.

    In the meantime, do not be worried. Mitt's got this thing in the bag. Plenty of time left.


    God bless America!



    Oh, and don't forget Everest College in Salt Lake City.  A real up and comer.

    Morris, who first ran Hitler's campaign in the 20's, does seem to 'examine' the polls as it were. I mean he never really liked Polish People anyway and how he ended up on the Clinton Administration is troubling to me; a real Poll as it were.

    But who are these pollsters talking with anyway?

    And Pollsters did not do a very good job with Dewey for chrissakes!

    Statistics befuddle me.

    Anyway 538 tells me that Mitt is toast and that is good enough for me.



    It's good to hear from you, I trust you completed your recent assignment to block the vote at SMU. Forget the polls, what I noticed is your speaking engagement in the Caymans five days before the election. Right on, keep Jeb's hopes alive by electing Obama.

    By the way, please stay out of Jerry Jones' box. I have to turn the game off because of indigestion, plus you manage to jinx America's favorite team when you show up.  



    Did you see that, according to polls, people like you more than Mitt?

    What do you say, rigged or not?

    That's because the oversampled democrats like me more than Mitt. We can debate about the polls, but there is no debate about what a great guy I am--the kind you would like to have a beer with--except I still don't drink beer nowadays.


    How about a doobie then?

    Decider, was wondering if you miss being The Decider?  I mean, you were the biggest cheese back in the day.  Did you like the job when you were in it?  Was it what you thought it would be?  Does Mitt call you up for advice now and then?

    Are you feeling as though you are at least a Decider, if not The Decider, these days as well?  What sorts of things do you get to Decide?  And how is that working for you?

    In our lives we travel many roads: rocky roads and smooth roads, crooked roads and straight roads, steep roads and flat roads. What I am saying is that for everything there is a seasoning and some purpose under heaven. In our lives, all of us get to be little deciders. The most important decision is whether to follow the Bible, but there are many, many more. I was fortunate that America trusted me to make the big decisions for America for as long as the Constitution allows. I will always give help to the new Presidents if they want my advice. thanks for the question, my American friend.

    Mr. Decider, it is good to see that you continue to have the gift of communication that some misunderestimated when you were the biggest cheese.  If you do decide to answer any of my other questions I will not misunderestimate your responses, rest assured.

    Lotta Ass-Polls out there.

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