While the U.S. economy continues to operate, the unemployment situation in the nation is still a giant area of concern. When unemployment hits 10 percent, economic heads explode. When it stays that way, it could be disastrous.

So while the recently passed “Jobs Bill” may seem like a nice addition to the battle for employment, U.S. politicos have yet to propose the only plan that could conceivably put the U.S. back on top.

It’s time to bring back slavery.

Slavery can bring this nation back to what it once was – a group of slaves and slave owners. With slavery, the American economy will once again be competitive. With slavery, once again, everyone will work.

No, before the screams of racism come wafting down, let me note that my vision for Slavery 2.0 is not based whatsoever on race. No, race is insignificant. All that matters is social standing. If you can afford a slave, you’re a slave owner. If you can’t, you’re a slave. It’s that simple.

And, of course, there would be rules. For instance, you can’t just up and kill a slave. There needs to be some type of paperwork filed beforehand. No other rules would be required, as the market would take care of itself.

In the end, slavery will help the U.S. in every way conceivable. Illegal immigration would end, as any illegal immigrants caught would be made into slaves. The U.S. labor market would have a way to fight back against China’s human-rights-violation labor market. New business would sprout up to take advantage of the cheap new labor market. Those that make manacles will have incredibly lucrative years.

My friends, America is known for its innovations. That’s why it’s time to return to slavery. Now, only slaves can save us.

Or, we could always just start putting more people in prison. Either way, it’s win-win.

–WKW