MINNESOTA – A wayward elf that froze to death in the snow last December has challenged the entire GOP Presidential Field to a debate on the U.S. Constitution, sources close to the Dead Elf say.

“He’s pretty confident. Or IT is pretty confident,” said the source. "I’m really not sure how to refer to an Elf corpse.”

The challenge comes after literally two consecutive years of Republican Presidential hopefuls butchering the Constitution in order to make it appear it agrees with their often-outlandish views. The most recent come from Pizza Guru Herman Cain, who confused the Declaration of Independence with the Constitution, while admonishing his fan base for not actually reading the Constitution.

The challenge comes shortly after a 16-year-old high school student challenged Presidential hopeful Michele Bachmann to a debate on the Constitution. While Bachmann has ignored the challenge, Republican sympathizers have berated the girl with threats.

“They can try, but they can’t shake up this Elf Thing,” said the Source. “It’s dead. It can’t get shook. And it can’t make anywhere near as many mistakes about the U.S. Constitution as Republicans make.

“And at very least, it can’t confuse the Constitution with the Declaration of Independence,” added the Source.

–WKW

Crossposted at William K. Wolfrum Chronicles