Richard Day's picture

    HOW TO WRITE GOOD!

    Sharpening a quill

    Kellogg, a psychologist at Saint Louis University, tours the research in the field, where many of the landmarks are his own. Some writers are "Beethovians" who disdain outlines and notes and instead "compose rough drafts immediately to discover what they have to say." Others are "Mozartians"—cough, cough—who have been known to "delay drafting for lengthy periods of time in order to allow for extensive reflection and planning." According to Kellogg, perfect-first-drafters and full-steam-aheaders report the same amount of productivity. Methinks someone is lying. And feel free to quote this line the next time an editor is nudging you for copy: "Although prewriting can be brief, experts approaching a serious writing assignment may spend hours, days, or weeks thinking about the task before initiating the draft."

    The scientifically-tested fun facts abound. Ann Chenoweth and John Hayes (2001) found that sentences are generated in a burst-pause-evaluate, burst-pause-evaluate pattern, with more experienced writers producing longer word bursts. A curly-haired girl on a white porch swing on a hot summer day will be more likely to remember what you've written if you employ concrete language—so says a 1995 study. S. K. Perry reports that the promise of money has a way of stimulating writerly "flow." Amazing! One also finds dreadful confirmation of one's worst habits: "Binge writing—hypomanic, euphoric marathon sessions to meet unrealistic deadlines—is generally counterproductive and potentially a source of depression and blocking," sums up the work of Robert Boice. One strategy: Try to limit your working hours, write at a set time each day, and try your best not to emotionally flip out or check email every 20 seconds. This is called "engineering" your environment.

    This meandering by one Michael Agger at Slate was interesting to me.

    As a successful writer at Dagblog (almost always assured of four comments and a couple hundred hits) I use a number of different methods to complete an opus.

    Then I recalled as an attorney how I would put a brief together. And there were basically two manners in which I worked.

    One method was simply to review several case opinions that were threaded together by a company known as Shepherd's—a conglomerate that kind of won a monopoly over legal threading through hard work, tricks with the copyright laws and further twisting of our Law of Patent.

    After properly cutting and pasting from judicial opinions over a period of hours or days I would begin to write a brief. Supposedly at some point in time I reached an epiphany of sorts with regard to the takes on issues by State and Federal Justices that helped my case and I go from there.

    Another method was using a stream of consciousness, writing my thoughts without much reference to anything and then doing some legal research.

    I have not thought about this for years but I really use both methods in weaving together my insignificant blogs.

    I read fifteen or twenty or thirty articles off of the web and then cut and paste the most interesting quotes or paragraphs onto my Word (read Word clone) which is my 'blank sheet'.

    After a day or two or three I review what bounty my fishing has wrought and see if I can find common threads.

    Other times I read something that really pisses me off (or really intrigues me) and I just write.

    So editing becomes everything. And I am not very good at editing. ha

    Agger, to my way of thinking is just discussing these two 'methods' and when he opines that someone is lying he misses the point.

    When Tiger Woods was 'on', he was on. Fairways and greens were the only places where his ball could land. And when some drive went errant, there was no look of fear or trepidation on the lad's face whatsoever. And it was more fun to watch at that point.

    What is more fun than a miracle shot from the rough, under some errant branch of a tree and over some other tree standing in the way of him and the green he is searching for? When Tiger was 'on' it was more fun watching him stuck in some impossible lie!

    Ted Williams had bad days but when he was 'on' he could hit anything.

    The intentional walk rule came into play because Babe Ruth became so pissed off at being intentionally walked that he would step out of the batter's box and swing away. Hahaha

    But I digress.

    When a good writer is 'on' (and give me a break folks, I am not talking about me) she can write and write and write without notes or cue cards or even bathroom breaks.

    The words just flow.

    I am really not a fan of Shakespeare (he wrote in a language that is long dead as far as I am concerned) but there are sections of dialogues and monologues that tell me he was on a run. You just know that as far as those runs, real editing just did not come into play!

    Other parts of his works demonstrate that he is reading some history from a tome and working to acclimate it his style and turn it into his plots. He became more of an editor than a pure writer during those sessions. Probably in a hurry to put on his next show!

    And nobody was ever going to 'correct' Tiger's stroke or Ted's swing or the Babe's bravado!

    The same goes for us peasants. Nobody is going to tell you how to write good! Ha

    Patton Oswalt does a riff on a comic he watched at some 'open mike'.

    The guy was a heroin addict.

    But one night this nobody took the mike and rocked according to Oswalt. He could do no wrong. The addict would begin a story and then nod off—right on stage. And then magically, the comic would awaken and relate more chapters in the story.

    Patton does another riff on a magician who was sooooooo very pissed off at being cheated monetarily on his contractual gig that he just acted like an ass during his performance.

    And Patton relates that this magician was so goddamn funny in his anger that the act rocked.

    Well, the audience was not impressed but Patton could not stop laughing.

     

     

    There is an element of context, of luck that might render a peasant writer a real gem of prose in terms of language from time to time.

    So I write and I advise others to write simply to see 'what comes out'.

    I wrote a critique of Stagecoach (1939) and the damn fonts screwed up but I thought it kind of added to the piece. I always figure that when the goddamn thing cannot be fixed!

    Anyway I wrote it in early July and Anonymous shows up and tells me a month later that Krugman and some other blogger magically found the same message.

    Now Krugman is a hero of mine and I know nothing about economics; but he surely hits on my talking points from time to time.

    I cannot take credit but: Post hoc, ergo propter hoc!

    Ha!

    You never know what epiphanies await you.

    Another article at Slate awakened me while I was numbly scanning meaningless crap:

    Honestly I've never been persuaded by Ulysses. To my mind, Joyce's best and most genuine work is the wonderful Dubliners; everything afterwards smacks of striving to write a "great" work, rather than simply striving to write—it's all too voulu. Although there are, of course, beautiful and breathtakingly authentic things in the novel (who could not love that tang of urine in the breakfast kidneys?), what spoils Ulysses for me, each time, is the oppressive allusiveness, the wearyingly overdetermined referentiality, the heavy constructedness of it all. Reading the book, for me, is never a rich and wonderful journey, filled with marvels and (no matter how many times you may read a book) surprises—the experience I want from a large and important novel; it's more like being on one of those Easter egg hunts you went on as a child—you constantly feel yourself being managed, being carefully steered in the direction of effortfully planted treats. Which, of course, makes them not feel very much like treats at all.

    The tip-off, for me, are the Gilbert and Linati Schemas, now included in most editions: the road-maps to the books that Joyce concocted for friends, minutely indicating the novel's themes, its labored structures, the Homeric analogies, etc.

    http://www.slate.com/id/2301312/

    Personally, to this day I can become lost in Ulysses. Jesus, one of Joyce's colleagues wrote a tome on the 'meaning' or 'meanings' of Ulysses that was longer than Ulysses. Hahahah

    Juliet Lapados writes this critique at Slate and it harkens me back to my take on other 'great works' of art.

    Like I have written, DaVinci's Mona Lisa means so little to me in comparison to other paintings by the Great Masters or the lesser peasant masters that I have viewed.

    Like movies, I have to be in the right mood to appreciate someone else's work or perspective.

    If I am not in the right mood I just cannot take The Good, the Bad & the Ugly.

    But if I am in the right mood, this film is the greatest western I have ever seen!

    OK look, let's be honest: Genesis has a knockout opening line. But it sure goes downhill fast: "And the earth was without form"; "And God said this"; "And God said that"; "And God said the other thing"; and on and on—I mean, did this guy sleep through high-school English, or what? No starting a sentence with and, pal. Not to mention his way with names: Arphaxad and Zillah, Mahalaleel and Magog, really? They sound like the baddies in one of those afternoon shows on the old WB network. Pretty hard to suspend disbelief when you're tripping over your tongue and rushing to change the channel. I admit the part about the flood and the big boat and the animals is exciting (though could have been funnier), and the whole Abraham and Isaac thing certainly leaves an impression. But it's just not well enough imagined to make you believe in it, and its style is so sloppy and varied it seems almost to have been written by committee. http://www.slate.com/id/2301312/

    Now I can get into a minor argument with Lapados ever this critique. I mean there were at least four different authors of Genesis and if you take into account the fact that each story in Genesis was originally a song from some tribe far far away and long long ago, how could this compendium flow?

    But if somebody just created this collection of short stories, I guess I would have to agree with fair Juliet.

    Anyway, these two articles at Slate (that I had forgotten about until I reviewed my tossed Word notes) give some incites into writing and appreciation of reading the writings of others.

    First draft @ http://onceuponaparadigm.wordpress.com/2011/08/18/writing/

     

    PS

    In her Human Events column today, Coulter writes that a "few well-place rifle rounds" would end the rioting in the United Kingdom. She then added that a "more sustained attack on the rampaging mob might save England from itself" because it would "remov[e]" more people from the welfare rolls:

    A few well-placed rifle rounds, and the rioting would end in an instant. A more sustained attack on the rampaging mob might save England from itself, finally removing shaved-head, drunken parasites from the benefits rolls that Britain can't find the will to abolish on moral or utilitarian grounds. We can be sure there's no danger of killing off the next Winston Churchill or Edmund Burke in these crowds...Coulter's incitement to massacre isn't the only thing wrong with the column. Coulter, no stranger to borderline racist commentary, also uses the riots to argue that progressive policies in the United Kingdom are debasing people with "long English ancestry and perfect Anglo features."

    In fact, Coulter begins her column by noting the race of some of the rioters: "Those of you following the barbaric rioting in Britain will not have failed to notice that a sizable proportion of the thugs are white, something not often seen in this country."

    It gets worse from there.

    She later says: "With a welfare system far more advanced than the United States, the British have achieved the remarkable result of turning entire communities of ancestral British people into tattooed, drunken brutes."

    http://mediamatters.org/blog/201108100038

    I had to add this little gem since it was in my notes already anyway.

    I know I attack repubs all the time. Teabaggers are animals as far as I am concerned.

    And I am certainly guilty of angry passion most of the time.

    But Ann is so cruel; so without compassion; so without humanity—most of the time—that I would not be without joy should she come down with some deadly virus.

    Coulter discovered somewhere, sometime that she could make money writing of the glory of the 3rd Reich, that she just could not pass up the opportunity.

    The same would go for Rush and beckerhead and the rest of the right wing contingent.

    But as she slams the poor, the disabled and the minority populations of Europe and America without qualification, I become really enraged.

    In the end the author should attempt to refrain from humanity's baser instincts.

    There should be some rules!


     

    Comments

    Richard, funny that we both wrote about writing today.  I read the whole article in Slate.  Unless I'm on deadline (which I never am anymore, dammit.), I don't see any reason to write faster.  I see many reasons to write better

    I do envy people who can write quickly and with many distractions, but I would envy them even more if I thought every word rat-a-tatting out of them was golden.  Of course, writing slowly doesn't mean words of gold, either.  It's just that writing takes an enormous amount of time, at least for me.  I write, edit, write, edit, and then edit some more.

    I tend to be this kind of writer:

    The scientifically-tested fun facts abound. Ann Chenoweth and John Hayes (2001) found that sentences are generated in a burst-pause-evaluate, burst-pause-evaluate pattern, with more experienced writers producing longer word bursts.

    I evaluate by getting up from my chair a hundred times during a writing session and talking to myself while I'm pacing around the room or the yard.  I have to hear what I've written before it makes any sense to me.

    But what made me laugh about the article is that I kept thinking about what you had to say about Ann Coulter.  Michael Agger, the author of the piece, might actually call Coulter a fine example of what he's talking about.  She's prolific so we know she writes fast.  She knows who she's writing for and knows exactly how to word her views in order to get them to buy her books.  She reads a lot and writes a lot.  She writes in clear sentences.  She's his gal!

    But to this I said, Huh??? 

    I remember, too, a former colleague who was blazingly fast. We would be joking at lunch—"Imagine if David Foster Wallace had written a children's book"—and there it would be in my inbox, 15 minutes later. Not a perfect draft, but publish-it-on-your-blog good.

    Funny, too, that David Foster Wallace comes up in both of our pieces.  I had to look him up, since I'd heard the name but didn't really know who he was. (One of my many lapses due to my insistence on learning only what I want to learn.)  I still don't get the references so I guess I'm going to have to go looking for something of his to read.

    Good post as usual, Richard.  It was fun.


    I never did get "Ulysses" either.  I only read it for the dirty parts.


    Well thank you Ramona! I felt shunned on this one. ha

    It can be as important what you write about as much as how you write it!

    I just finished reading Hitchens today though and unlike Coulter; this guy CAN WRITE!


    Writing.  I wish I could put down all the words and stories in my head more easily.   I normally write in two ways. One, is what I do when I write haikus; it is off-the-cuff, just making it up on the fly, and playing with words and meanings till it sounds right.  That seems to come quite easily to me and I can make up spontaneous poems and haikus almost on demand. (alas, there is not much demand for that sort of thing, especially since I've vowed not to become the crazy wild-eyed guy with the unkempt appearance who approaches people in the park with an offer to write a personal poem for them for a dollar. But I digress.)  Sometimes I'll start with an opening line for a haiku and just see where it goes. Sometimes it just flows out in perfect 5-7-5 form. Other times I have to struggle to make the words fit or the thought more concise.  

    The other way I write is when I write longer pieces, short stories or plays.  I tend to write and constantly act out the dialogue, if not verbally, then in my head.  Then, I go where the logic takes me.  The jokes often just pop up out of the situation.  I'm like Ramona and tend to get up and walk around a lot and then come back and re-write again and again. 

    Writing is such a strange and wonderful thing when it is flowing ...and such an annoying, frustrating thing when nothing seems to work and everything you write seems trite or ridiculous.  There is a whole cottage industry of blog-writers with chronic diseases.  I marvel at some of them for their ability to wallow in their suffering and create blogs about how much pain they are in. Unfortunately, I don't seem to have much interest in doing that.


    Oh, I so agree with everything you said in that last paragraph.  I can save drafts on Blogger, and last I looked I had 31 unfinished pieces that may never see the light of day.  I also print up pages and read them that way to see if what I'm writing is working. 

    I edit constantly, even after a piece is published.  I can do that as a blogger, which is one of the reasons I love blogging.  But when I worked for pay, I agonized over every piece, picking it apart and hating how I did it; wondering as I read it in print how I could have missed such obvious flaws.  Every single piece I've ever published could have been done better, yet when I submit them I believe they're perfectly okay.  (Obviously, or I wouldn't have submitted them.)

    But you are the first one I've read who will talk honestly about the chronic disease writers. I don't find any of it interesting, either, but I understand how it must be all-consuming to the people suffering.  If writing is their outlet, it's natural to write about the one unwelcome constant in their lives, and blogging is an easy, satisfying way to get it all out.

    Someone asked me once to ghost-write a book about menopause.  I reminded her that there were probably thousands of books and articles already written about menopause, including Gail Sheehey's best-seller on the subject, but she  was sure her own story was unique and worthy of yet another book.  She offered a goodly start-up sum but I turned it down without even sleeping on it.  There's nothing the least bit interesting about hot flashes.

     


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