WASHINGTON — Stating that it was only a matter of time before they beat themselves to death, top Republicans have come forward pleading for the Democratic Party to stop hitting themselves.

Following the passage of Health Care Reform, concerned Republicans have come out in force, begging Democrats to stop battering themselves with their own legislation, which is naturally causing them to receive threats of violence.

“The Democratic leadership has to take some moral responsibility for having behaved with such arrogance, in such a hostile way, that the American people are deeply upset,” said disgraced former Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich, making it clear that any threats or acts of violence against Democrats was the result of Democrats.

Nonetheless, Democrats have shown a complete unwillingness to stop governing. Non-Partisan political pundit Karl Rove said Democrats have once again misjudged their mandate.

“Elections matter when Republicans win,” said Rove. When Democrats win, they just need to let the Republicans govern. If they don’t they are just asking to kill themselves.”

Still, while a large number of Democrats have come forward and admitted they have received threats against their lives, Republicans have shown they think their opponents are a bunch of candy-asses.

“Things were just as bad, just as heated when Bush was president with the Patriot Act and the Iraq war, but you didn’t see Republicans running to the camera crying about it,” said CNN spokesman Erick Erikson.

For his part, Gingrich refused to blame fringe conservatives with threats or acts of terrorism.

“The fact is, Democrats are hitting themselves,” said Gingrich. “Why don’t they stop hitting themselves? Eventually they are going to kill themselves and only have themselves to blame.”

–WKW

Crossposted at William K. Wolfrum Chronicles