This is your America on Oil:

BP CEO Tony Hayward, relaxing at home with the small people now that he has his life back.

The U.S. was down 2-0, but fought back to tie 2-2 against Slovenia in a game that will be remembered for the Referee making a horrible call that stole victory from the Americans. While the three points were stolen, the tie gives the U.S. an excellent chance to advance out of the group stage. Plus, the U.S. certainly impressed with their determination and fire in coming back to save their World Cup hopes.

Ron Artest enjoys his first NBA Championship as the Lakers finally beat the Celtics in a Game 7.

The Good news? You can live forever. The Bad News? You’ll have to be a jellyfish to pull it off.

President Barack Obama's speech on Tuesday night has garnered some negative reviews, not so much due to the message itself - that's inconsequential, after all - as much as the difficult language used by our Commander-in-Chief. Paul Payack, the president of Global Language Monitor, a Texas-based company that analyzes the cultural impact of word choices, considered President Obama's speech to have been written at a 9.8 grade level.

KENTUCKY – Following its hyper-successful “KFC Famous Bowls” and “Double-Down Sandwich” campaigns, KFC has announced its newest promotion – “KFC’s Eat It Off The Floor, Bitch!” combo.

June 16, 2030

Brazil fan Zé Aparecido was pensive during the first half of Brazil-North Korea World Cup match.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that lower taxes and smaller government lead to economic growth, while higher taxes and bigger government hold the economy back. And like many truths that are universally acknowledged, it is frequently contradicted by easily observable facts and that makes no difference. Economics especially seems to be full of these ironclad universal rules that only hold true some of the time, in elegantly controlled micro-economic examples.

Two weeks ago, my co-bloggers urged the American government to press Israel to end its blockade of the Gaza strip. I was skeptical that American pressure would be effective. One universal truth of sovereign nation states is that no one appreciates self-righteous foreigners telling them what to what to do, especially self-righteous foreigners with their own tainted records.

Only 600,000 or so were killed in the Civil War. So, if you're a Southern politician, why not promote wildly secessionist language in your TV ads?

“Would you just stop it with the forsaking already?”

We Americans are an independent people with a do-it-yourself attitude. And no one proves that more than Gary Brooks Faulkner. The 50-ish American – armed with a pistol, 40-inch sword, night-vision goggles and book of Christian verses – went to Pakistan on a one-man mission to behead Osama bin Laden.

“God is with me, and I am confident I will be successful in killing him,” Faulkner said.

SOUTH AFRICA – Faced with a barrage of bad press about the endless drone of vuvuzelas during World Cup matches, South African President Jacob Zuna today announced that he will ban the horn-like instrument, provided the Western world stop exploiting Africa.

Was Chuck Liddell getting knocked cold worth it for Dana White and the UFC?

They say a tie is like kissing your sister. Of course, those saying that are a bunch of sick, sister-kissing freaks, so it may just be best to ignore them, especially when it comes to the U.S. National Soccer team holding mighty England to a draw in the 2010 World Cup.

Some times you just have to rub the lion. More on this story (in Portuguese) here.

(Soldiers rescue survivors during D-Day, 66 years ago today. Click here for more photos.)