The Bishop and the Butterfly: Murder, Politics, and the End of the Jazz Age
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    A Lesser Conversation About Suicide

    By Danny Cardwell on Sun, 03/22/2015 - 9:05pm |

    I read a statistic that deeply affected me: There are almost 40,000 suicides every year in America. I find myself questioning what role, if any, our society plays in helping someone make the choice to end life? 

    The suicide rate has tripled for the 15 to 24 age group. This gives me pause. These are the kids I mentor, tutor and lift weights with: I have friends who have children in this increasingly troubled demographic.

    The premium our society places on status and wealth is a component of youth suicide that was almost nonexistent in years past. Too many young people view themselves based on a set of metrics created by advertising and marketing firms. I don't discount the role drugs, alcohol and depression play, but let's look deeper. What's at the root of some of these insecurities? Too many young people are self medicating their depression with drugs and alcohol.

    I have a friend from Nigeria, Adawale Adelke, who taught me a valuable lesson about life and ideology. He said, "we (in the west) are so concerned with deciding whether the glass is half full or half empty that we don't appreciate the fact that a large number of people in the world don't have a glass." I don't know if he is the original author of this saying, but there is wisdom in it. This is how free market capitalist ideology functions in our society. While parts of the world are starving and dealing with existential angst, we are consumed with the half empty glass in the form of iPhones, Abercrombie and Fitch, and Air Jordan’s. We struggle to find the items that will fill our glass.

    Too many people, young and old, have accepted the lie that their worth is directly tied to physical commodities. We're subconsciously being told the only way to fit into our bourgeois society is by chasing labels. The belief that our soul is less valuable than a physical commodity is a misnomer too many accept as truth. How can we destroy a message this powerful if it's in the mind of someone trapped in the bubble of airbrushed models, $600 dollar designer jeans and new Apple products?

    Comments

    I have to agree that it is weird that we go along regularly not giving much attention to the number of overall suicides in our country.  But it does seem to have a parallel to mental health and how we are dealing that as a society.  One of the people that has expressed leadership in this area is our previous first lady Rosalyn Carter and she has my admiration and gratitude for that. 

    I am hearing more of a conversation moving away from income/work=personal value and I have good feelings about that and hope the ideas continue to be cultivated.

     I think there are many drawbacks we have yet to fully recognize from our new technological frenzy.  I would not say the advantages are outweighed by them but just the extreme waste we create from cell phones, and lap top computers that don't last long and include toxic chemicals are something that gives me pause.  

    I would say based on my experience the best thing we can do in response is get involved with other people to address issues that call to us.  Get right to the heart of the matter and bring your energy to it.  I am attempting to do this myself and it feels a little bit like each person stating 'we are going to the moon' inside, taking on things that seem big or insurmountable.   But the option of just noticing things and calling attention to them and then doing nothing feels very empty.

    I have friended many young people that are friends of my daughters over the years.  I have jumped right in on Facebook in response to suicidal rants with love and connection which has fortunately gone well so far for me.  I have been there for a young man that reached out to me in ER that overdosed, foaming at the mouth and then in intensive care for weeks.  I searched out the best rehab I could find for him.  He has thanked me for saving his life.  I won't take credit and this is not shared in order to say 'look how great I am' but offered as an example of what a person can do.  

    As much as human beings can be a needy massive, cruel, mess, we are also capable of such unconditional love, acts of bravery, sacrifice, genius, and altruism.   I actually have faith in the majority of human beings being able to change things for the better and I love all of the skeptics out there too:)

     


    by synchronicity on Sun, 03/22/2015 - 11:11pm

    Also you might consider making your font a size bigger.  <3


    by synchronicity on Sun, 03/22/2015 - 11:12pm

    I fixed it. Dag default is 13px, which somehow got dropped from the size selector. I'll get it back in there. Meanwhile, 12px is close.


    by Michael Wolraich on Mon, 03/23/2015 - 12:38am

    A worthy question, but I'm afraid suicide is defies easy sociological explanations. For instance, the idea that suicide is a "western" or "first world" problem is a myth. Check the rankings. Guyana is #4. Kazakhstan is #5. The U.S. is #30, right above Cuba. Go figure.


    by Michael Wolraich on Mon, 03/23/2015 - 12:37am

    Great article as usual, Danny.
    .
    I think the key is to teach young people from birth the importance of becoming their own hero - and while this is contrary to social mores - teach them that the ONLY mature and constructive form of competition is to compete against the person that they were the day before. When kids are raised that way, they understand how frivolous the rat race is at a very early age.

    .
    Everything we do in life - other than seeking to satisfy our primary needs of oxygen, food, water, and shelter - is done to enhance our feelings of self-esteem (or reduce our feelings of insecurity).  So we try to obtain "things" to impress others, and gain their admiration. That, in turn, makes us feel better about ourselves - for a moment. Because there's only one problem with that - no matter how much you manage to impress others, if you're shallow and not about nothing, YOU will know it. So in the final analysis, trying to impress others is a waste of time  So it's extremely important to invest in yourself, and do those things like developing the kind of skills, character, wisdom, and knowledge that will make you feel good about yourself.
    If you do that, you'll rarely be depressed, and you'll have so many skills, interests, and so much curiosity, that you'll always be able to entertain yourself.
    .
    "God," and/or nature, made birds to fly, fish to swim, and man to think. If a bird refuses to fly, he can't survive; if a fish refuses to swim, he won't survive. But as men, we refuse to adhere to our nature. We go through life seeking to satisfy a that vague yearning that we feel inside, but we just can't put our finger on it. And no matter how much we scratch - how many cars we buy, how many women we go through, or how hard we party - we just can't quite scratch that itch.  As a result we live like a dog chasing his tail, and that causes depression in many people. What most people don't realize is, that itch is the need to think and grow, and if we fail to do that, just like the bird that refuses to fly, and the fish that refuses to swim, we're not going to survive, either as individuals, or as a species.    


    by Wattree on Wed, 03/25/2015 - 9:45pm