with apologies to Sam Cooke

She don't know much about history
She don't believe in biology
She wants to change the science books
She wants to fire the White House cooks
But she does know how to speak on cue
And she knows if she makes fools of you
What a wonderful veep she would be

She don't know much about geography
She don't know much foreign policy
Don't know much about George Bush's war
Don't know what a VP is for
But she knows that one and one is two
And if McCain just tells her what to do

Those who know my writing here are aware that I have little love for Hillary Clinton. Had she won the nomination, I would have voted for her but not happily. But whatever her flaws, Clinton is extremely intelligent. She has a better command of public and foreign policy than any other candidate who participated in the primaries. Barack Obama, of course, is brilliant in his own right, as is Joe Biden.

Sometimes I feel as if we're all participating in some kind of psychology experiment and that any minute now, an old guy in a white coat will peer down from the heavens and tell us that we can remove our armbands and go home. Recent political events seem designed to expose our rational failings and prove that in the end, we're all just rats in a maze.

From Greg Sargent at Election Central:

The McCain campaign triples-down on its "celeb" sneer, releasing a
third ad on the topic that hits the theme even harder than the last
two...Clearly, the McCain camp thinks this is working, and they're going to keep hammering away at it for weeks, if not months.

Two month ago, John McCain challenged Barack Obama to visit Iraq, expecting him to decline, but Obama called the bluff. He saw McCain's Iraq and raised him Afghanistan, Israel, and three European nations. Never one to fold easily, McCain raised Obama right back.

According to the non-partisan Tax Policy Center, John McCain's recently released tax plan is very regressive "even compared with a system in which the 2001-06 tax cuts are made permanent." It provides "relatively little tax relief to those at the bottom of the income scale while providing huge tax cuts to households at the very top of the income distribution."

After a string of embarrassing election losses, Republicans have had enough. In a major address to the American people, Representative Jeb Hensarling of Texas, chairman of the underrated Republican Study Committee, has declared that Republicans leaders are feeling sober.

This world is the will to power -- and nothing besides.
-- Nietzsche, The Will to Power

Nietzsche has argued that the will to power, the will to not only survive but to dominate, is the fundamental driving force of all life. The will to truth, by contrast, is subsidiary. We seek truth in order to increase our power. But Nietzsche regards truth as an artificial construct. The powerful are capable of creating truth as an exercise of power and as a means of extending their dominance.

This is rather alarming. Apparently, the "electability" powerpoint that Clinton sent out to House Dems was a decoy. Select uncommitted superdelegates obtained a very different pointpoint. I've managed to obtain a leaked copy and posted it here. Please check it out, and forward it to your friends.

A couple of days ago, I argued that after Tuesday, the race would essentially be over because there would no longer be a way for Clinton to win the popular vote, her only remaining plausible argument for superdelegates to vote for her.

I've declared repeatedly since the PA primary that this race is over soon after May 6th. Despite the high anxiety of Obama supporters and all the talk of Clinton momentum, I stand by this projection. My reason for saying so is very simple. There will not be enough remaining votes after May 6th to make a difference. Not to the delegate count. Not to the popular vote. After May 6th, you won't need any fancy delegate calculators to see that. It will be obvious to all.

Have you been feeling "fuzzy" lately? Blinded by passion? Addled by rage? Do you find yourself ranting about MSM unfairness and the well-known bias of certain TPM staffers? (I won't name any names but it rhymes with "Breg Bargent".) Do you hurl potted plants at your television or periodically spit on your monitor? Do you pound the "recommend" button manically when you see an anti-Hillary post, even though it only works the first time? Have your purchased five or more computers so that you can vent your anger through multiple recommendations?

1) Say "I'm tough". Say it a lot. Also, use the word "fight" in every other sentence.

2) Promise not to quit. Ever. Consequences be damned.

3) Compare yourself to tough historical figures. Like Rocky.

4) Do not apologize. Tough people don't apologize. Rocky doesn't apologize.

5) Tell anecdotes of about yourself in tough situations. E.g. "We landed under sniper fire and had to run to our vehicles."

6) Play tough music. Examples:
- Eye Of the Tiger (Survivor)
- I Won't Back Down (Tom Petty)

The day before the Pennsylvania primary, Barack Obama's campaign has been rocked by news of another troublesome relationship. There have been reports that Obama is separated by only six degrees from mass-murdering terrorist Osama Bin Laden. According to the reports, Obama's kindergarten teacher's family friend's cousin's doorman's grandmother was the kindergarten teacher of mass-murdering terrorist Osama Bin Laden.

Perhaps you've heard of Barack Obama's shocking condescension to the good working people of small town Pennsylvania and Hillary Clinton's courageous defense of their blissful collective mental health. We Democrats, it seems, have a problem connecting with the happy little working people, which is a bit of a shame because their votes would really come in helpful this November. They used to be our little people, you know, before Reagan stole them away from us with his family values sham. I think it's time to get them back.

This is a three part series. I recommend that you first read Part I and Part II, or you will be confused and slightly disoriented. You may experience sensations of nausea.

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Live dance-off blogging. Remember, the outcome of the dance competition will determine the Democratic nominee. There are three competitions: ballroom, breakdance, and free-style.

This is a three part series. I recommend that you first read Part I, or you will be confused and slightly disoriented. You may experience sensations of nausea.

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I'm now in the rehearsal studio with the Clintons. I'm impressed with their tango. Hillary in particular seems poised and disciplined. They've been drilling the same step for half an hour. Bill seems like he's fading a bit, and they've agreed to take a break to answer a few questions:

Back in the warm, fuzzy days of January in South Carolina, Barack Obama was asked whether Bill Clinton deserved to be called the first black president. He replied "I would have to, you know, investigate more of Bill's dancing abilities...before I accurately judge whether he was in fact a brother," to which Hillary Clinton replied, "I'm sure that can be arranged."

All the Obama people can talk about after their savior got his butt kicked is math, math, math, math, math, math, math. Whatever. I respect math. Without math, there'd be no particle physics, sports stats, or sudoku, and it would be hard to figure out if you'd received the correct change. But let's not overdo it. First, math isn't tangible, so we can't know for sure if it even exists. Second, it's confusing, and anything confusing is probably a government conspiracy.