Always quick to pounce on a big opportunity, political entertainer Sarah Palin today announced she has signed a $5-million deal to hawk sex enhancement products on QVC.

“If you’re tired of being limp and impotent, I’m here to help,” said Palin. “Why, I’ll make millions just from the lamestream media.”

The deal comes after Palin’s recent comments on the Sean Hannity Show:

NEW YORK — There has been a recent discovery that an unidentified person walked into an unidentified establishment between 3 p.m. and 7 p.m. sometime between Tuesday and Thursday this week. The person, reportedly between the age of 23 to 57, was possibly carrying “zero to four" bags, sources were unable to confirm.

The incident was originally reported at the Web site Drudge Report, under the headline “LIBERAL BAG-TOTING ACTIVIST REIGNS TERROR ON AMERICA.”

So Beck is going to start his own news website is he, well, AP, take that!

cue Meredith Brooks:

Alan Simpson’s opinion of Social Security and those that accept it.

News/Politics

Pakistan Floods: The watery nightmare continues unabated.

Via Palingates:

NEW YORK – Ann Thomson, an 83-year-old widow, was awoken last last night to screams of protests by angry conservatives at her her home on 39th Street, in an area known as Hell’s Kitchen.

The protesters were angry that Thompson, a long-time liberal, had told a friend that she didn’t mind the Islamic Center being built two blocks away from Ground Zero.

Sarah Palin talking with “Nicolas Sarkozy.” We must never forget.

Bats. Why did they have to be bats?

News/Politics

Pakistan Floods: Capitalism not stepping up to the plate to help out Pakistanis stuck in a watery hell.

A good blog is a back-and-forth experience between writer and reader. When a blog reaches its apex, commentary and conversation meld together, making reader and writer one.

Of course, sometimes, this tight of a relationship can mean a level of complacency can creep in. Things can go unsaid. Which is why today, I’d like to send out a thank you to my readers.

Thank you, dear readers, for not killing anyone.

If Bill Cosby would just remember that he made “Leonard Part 6,” maybe he’d rethink his stance on living.

News/Dinosaurs

Iran: Many an Iranian will look back to this day as the day someone almost killed Ahmadinehad.

From time to time I’ve been known to escape the confines of this blog, and this week is one of those times, as I have some stories up at The National, an English newspaper in the United Arab Emirates.

The stories – given to me by former colleague Paul Oberjuerge – were on sporting venues in South America. The three stories:

Despite early failures such as the one above, Jake Tapper has still managed to achieve lofty status in the D.C. media world.

Vampire Babies. Yes, we’ve reached the point of a demand for Vampire Babies. I just have to believe these are the death throes of a dying fad.

Wolfrum’s Word

Is anyone really talking that much about the Pentagon’s inability to account for $8.7 billion in Iraqi reconstruction funds?

Basil Marceaux for Governor. Have a nice day. (Via Mario Piperni)

Being one of the most influential bloggers on the planet is no easy chore. The endless 18-hour work days can be hard on myself, and my family. Plus, the mainstream media and much of the general public have almost no respect for bloggers. And the pay is horrible.

Now, for the first two issues, there’s little I can do. I am dedicated to the craft, after all. But for the money part, I have learned that there is one thing I can do to make this blog lucrative. And that’s what I’m going to do.

I’m going Huffington Postisize this bitch.

How do I know, he asked me if I was investing in gold or selling gold. OMG, this guy, even though he is a landscaper, or some such thing, has three kids, gets his health care from the state because he doesn't make much money, recevies food stamps, and aid to go to school. But he always rants about ObamaCare, socialism, fascism, etc! What? Yes you are thinking the same thing I am. However, Beck is ripping off poor folk, who don't know any better, and I feel bad for them.

Al Gore has been accused of sexual assault. He has not been charged with anything at this stage, and may or may not be in the future. But a Portland woman has accused him of sexual assault, and according to the National Enquirer, it’s possible two other women are making similar accusations. Gore recently met with Portland police in regard to the allegations.

From CBS News: