In the upcoming weeks and months, we’ll all be introduced to the new Mitt Romney. Or, perhaps the new new Mitt Romney. Or even the new new new Mitt Romney. All that matters is that whatever happened in the past, Romney is totally a serious strict Constitionalist hyper-conservative now and he won’t be changing until the wind changes direction.

AMERICA – A Federal Court in Florida has struck down Capitalism, ruling that the requirement for individuals to live under any type of economic system is unconstitutional.

Having watched events unfold in Egypt this past week, I must say I am impressed by the bravery and strength of will shown by the Egyptian people. They are standing tall against a dictatorial regime, and that is to be applauded.

A while back, I wrote a post entitled “Sarah Palin will always be funny. Always!” In it, I had this to say:

“I am shocked and offended that there are those out there that will say they are ’sick of Sarah Palin jokes.’”

Yesterday, here’s how Palin countered Obama’s use of the “Sputnik Moment” analogy in his State of the Union Address:

There. Now you can find it on a map.

You can find out more about the protests in Egypt and the U.S. response here, or follow the breaking news on Twitter with the #Jan25 hashtag. Or just be happy that you now know where it is.

–WKW

Hey everyone!

First, let me thank the Undecided Voters who have asked me to give this rebuttal - which is like a speech thing I'm told and is important.  Anyway, President Barack Obama's was talking last night was on a bunch of channels I'm told. I saw a little of it and thought his tie was kind of weird, but maybe it stood for something important like Barney.

Before I start this blog post, let me make one thing absolutely clear - I do not, under any circumstance, advocate armed insurrection against the United States. That, my friends, is totally not my scene.

In a short matter of time, Conservative thinkers have leaped completely over Libertarianism and moved on to full-fledged Nihilism. The New York Times' Ross Douthat leads the charge

:

Liberals and the Twitters are all abuzz after it was announced that Keith Olbermann taped his last "Countdown" show on MSNBC tonight and will be leaving the network. While immediate speculation was made about Comcast's purchase of NBC being why, thus far, no reason has been given.

TUPELO, MISS — Tim Johnson – a vital source to journalist and blogger William K. Wolfrum – has been declared missing after disappearing a week ago following a camping excursion. Johnson, 43, was last seen doing arm curls with a baby bear last Friday. His whereabouts are currently unknown.

Johnson has been a featured source in numerous blog posts by Wolfrum, including:

VATICAN - Pope John Paul II will be beatified on May 1, after Vatican officials judged that the deceased pontiff's ability to make child molestation and sexual abuse charges seem like no big deal was officially a miracle.

Hello everyone, and welcome to today’s episode of “Answering the Stupidest Questions.”

(Applause)

Today, Time Magazines dares to ask the question ringing in hardly anyone’s mind: “Does the Death of 200 Cows in Wisconsin Confirm Biblical Prophecy?”

A story of a dog’s dedication to its family, following their deaths last week in Brazil. Translated from Fohla.com:

The former street-dog Caramelo helped rescue the bodies of its owners, whose were killed during last week’s rains, then did not want to leave the makeshift grave of his owner.

SWEDEN - After a full decade of research, a team of Swedish scientists has confirmed that no matter how many guns a man owns, his penis will remain small and insignificant.

Those inside Sarah Palin's inner circle have come forward to admit the ex-Governor of Alaska was truly heartbroken over the recent massacre in Arizona.

"Sarah is destroyed." said a Palin Associate. "She had a new ad with her holding a hunting rifle to Obama's head. It's a great ad. And harmless. But now she just can't use it.

As the big news agencies initially fumbled the Arizona Massacre story by reporting that Rep. Gabrielle Giffords had been killed by shooter Jared Lee Loughner, online news has shown its strength with numerous takes on the shooting, as well as breaking information.

Here are some stories you may be interested in from around the Web:

Groucho always knew the score …

Because I know you have been thinking of me, here I am ...

... hanging out next to the remains of Christopher Columbus ...

... shooting the bull ...

... and enjoying some local flavor.

NORTH POLE - Looking trim following lap-band surgery, Santa Claus held a press conference today to announce a fundamental change in his long-time tradition of giving toys to good children.

Intent on cutting costs as well as teaching ideological lessons, Claus, 43, said that the time was now for Americans to stop looking for handouts.