Questions: The Wedding Edition

Must be played

• Wedding: Mendelssohn's "Wedding March"
• Reception: Kames' The Chicken Dance

Should not be played

• Wedding: Kames' The Chicken Dance
• Reception: Mendelssohn's "Wedding March"

Glad to be of help. ;)

In all seriousness, my cousin's fiancee' wrote a piece for their reception which was outstanding. Alas, I'm not sure if it's in the public domain, and if it is, what it was called, so not much help there.

Must be played @ Reception

"Candy" by Cameo *  Must do the electric slide to this.

Must never be played:

The absolute worst song that hath ever been played at a wedding.  The best man thought it would be funny to play I'm F@(*!(&@ You Tonight by RKelly and Biggie.  Seriously.  The bride's father was less than amused.

 

Eye of the Tiger. MUST.

Just because you need to be sure Genghis is NOT in the house. If he comes forward, and starts stylin' all over your tilin', flee.

Repeat. Do NOT attempt to engage.

Every wedding:  Love Today, Mika

No wedding:  White Wedding, Billy Idol; anything by Motley Crue; that song Dija said; the Chicken Dance song, oh, and this really happened to me, Add It Up by the Violent Femmes

At a friend's wedding recently, "In My Life" by the Beatles seemed highly appropriate. They did the iPod thing, btw -- totally worked great.

1. Short
2. I knew a significant number of the people
3. Unusual (e.g., I had a Hindu friend who was marrying a Christian. Their wedding was quite interesting.)

1.  Good friends/family

2.  Great music

3.  Good table arrangements

4.  Open bar

5.  The bride and groom are genuinely enjoying themselves and part of the reception :)

The weddings I enjoyed least were where everything was scheduled to the second and there were people ordering you to dance now instead of letting things happen more naturally.  Or the bride and groom were so busy taking photos, etc. that they leave guests waiting forever.

Smokin' hot bridesmaids. Though a couple had smokin' hot brides.

Yeeeaaaaah baby. (Best Austin Powers grin.)

Most:  People I cared about.

Least:  People I didn't much care about.

Short, sincere, personalized ceremony. Not too hot. If I was working, not having friends there. If if wasn't, having at least a few people I knew and liked to talk to. Bride and groom at least appearing to be unstressed. Fantastic homebrew beer. Beautiful setting. Kids playing.

For me, 50-100, but that's definitely a taste thing.

The bigger the better, but it's important to let them in in rotations. You know, some for the vows, some for the food, some for the chat, some for the dancing, some for the sex with drunken bridesmaids, etc.

A dozen.

A, hands down.

A, for sure :)

Takin' the twins somewhere hot and sunny.

e) None of the above.

For me, or to attend? To attend -- big party, but not particularly lavish. For me -- ideal but unrealistic would probably be a destination thing; but I wouldn't be able to keep the guest list small enough.

Listen to your future wife. If she's not happy with the wedding, then you'll hear about it for the rest of your life…

(OK, I'm being more than a little sexist here and assuming the details matter a lot more to her than to you.)

Bein' left at the altar isn't as bad as it sounds. Give it 20, 25 years, and it's ok. Really. No. Really.

Don't stress on decisions, details, or control, and don't put up with stuff from people who logically should have no say, and don't worry after you don't put up with their stuff.

Don't try to make everyone else happy...this is you and your future wife's special day!

On the details of your special day that really matter to the two of you - make it the way you want it, even if others are suggesting to do it another way (and even if they're helping to pay for it).  These are the things that will make it memorable for you.

As far as everything else - don't sweat it. If you don't care what food will be served or what time the bouquet will be thrown then don't worry about those details...let the others helping you plan/pay take the lead and run with it so there is less stress for the two of you. 

One final note - What's the worst thing that can happen?  Your wedding is a disaster and you still wake up the next day with your beautiful new bride next to you.  Not so bad right?

I haven't gone through my own wedding, but I've been "professionally" involved in enough that I feel qualified to comment: plan all the details that matter ahead of time, but on the wedding day itself don't worry about any of it. Something's going to go wrong; someone will get lost on the way, things won't start on time, whatever... And ultimately none of that will matter. Also, don't worry about what "people do" in planning your wedding. Everyone does it differently, and the only thing that matters is that you figure out what's important to you (and possibly your family, especially if they're paying).

The "obey" bit. Presumably, you're already omitting that from your wedding, however.

That's a rather Nietzschean question.  Wedding Obliteration could be one of those bad punk albums, using that post Larry did a few months ago.

Tuxedos would be a nice start.

Bouquet toss. Especially when the bride starts shouting out the names of her single friends when she sees they're not on the floor. One of my friends actually had a special "tossing" bouquet prepared that split into a dozen mini-bouquets mid-air. I thought that was a cool way to modify the tradition, but I'd rather do without the embarass-the-single-girls-while-emphasizing-that-they-won't-be-whole-until-wed bit entirely.

I've always had a fondness for the desserts. That, coupled with the fact that most wedding reception food tries too hard makes it a very easy choice.

Mmmm. Wedding cake.  So long as it's not all covered in icky fondant.

The McNuggets.

Quality apps.

Typical wedding meal? The food usually seems pretty "blah" -- cake included -- so I'd have to go with drinks. Though I've definitely had some excellent wedding meals, too. And I love it when people vary the "cake" idea: layered (on platters) tiramisu for a friend who doesn't like cake; cupcakes (they're "in" now, can be very tasty, and allow for a nice variety of flavors); a flat, white goat cheese wheel (for a couple very fond of cheese).

The ones where the bride and groom have two different ethnicities, because it makes it more interesting. Of course, see my comment in #5 as to why interesting might not be a good thing…

Best I've seen are the ones where it crosses lines of hatred and war. At the wedding ceremony, they start with all this stiffness and tension, but then you can see people start to get teary, and realizing that they're forming a new kind of union, stepping into a new time.

Then, at the reception, everyone gets hammered and the knuckle-to-head action starts. That shit's worth payin' to watch. UFC got nuthin'.

I can't get over my objection to ethnic as a modifier, as if some weddings are ethnicity-free.

• Optimal: individually tailored gifts.
• If you're time-pressed and have money to spend: sports massages
• If Genghis is one of your groomsmen: nose and ear hair trimmer

A year's subscription to dagblog.com.

A year's subscription to deadman's RSS feed from dagblog.com.

Pliers.

a) DJ

b) Buffet

c) Chicken Dance

d) Something vegetarian…

e) White chocolate wedding cake

f) Individualized vows

g) Tux

h) Probably not

i) Big-Screen TV

j) Menu choices on invitation (see d, above)

A) DJ

B) Sit down

C) Electric Slide (to "Candy")

D)  Mmmm.  Sushi.

E) Red Velvet :)

F)  Short and sweet individual vows that doesn't sound cribbed from a novel with Fabio on the front.

G)  Who cares?  It's all about the bride's fashion choices :)

H) *shrug*

I)  China because it's something you likely wouldn't by for yourself.  And you can use for holidays etc.

J) Menu choices on invitation - YES!  Makes life so much easier day of for the caterer (and for the guests to guarantee they don't run out of anything)

Dude. Just this quiz alone is turnin' into a workout. Toooo mannnnny choices. Must have beer.

So you really like this chick, eh? 

a) neither, b) neither, a classy restaurant, c) neither, d) sushi, e) always pick chocolate, f) individualized, g) neither, h) not, i) TV, j) no.

A- depends. B- depends. C- no opinion. D- Sushi. E- the couple's favorite flavor. F- individualized. G-depends on the style of the rest of the wedding. H- I'd say yes, but maybe that's 'cause I've never been anywhere close to getting married. I- china, just 'cause it's easier to split into sub-gifts for the peeps. J- depends on the caterer and venue. Not having choice cards is classier/easier on the peeps, but classier doesn't hold much weight if it's going to mean some people can't get what they'd want 'cause the caterer runs out.