Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Arrivederci, Columbus

    All statues, like all politics, are local. They're about the place where they are put up, and they change that place (which is to say, they're political). It's a mistake to think a statue is put up to represent some eternal truth; they're a local statement about the politics of the moment. So it is with Christopher Columbus, who got statues and a national holiday for political, and progressive reasons. Those statues don't seem progressive anymore, for a simple reason: they worked. So they've outlived their purpose.

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    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    He Knows He's Losing: Trump as Mike Tyson

    The most obvious thing to me about last night's toxic sludge fire of a debate is that Trump knows he's losing. Bigly. And he has no idea what to do about it. Many pundits are confused on this point, because they treat Trump as a conventional politician or as a media figure rather than as a psychiatric patient. And if you don't view Trump through the lens of his maladies, you misunderstand him. Trump is not a serious politician. Comparing him to other Republican presidential candidates doesn't help you understand him. This is not Mitt Romney.

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    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    The Shockingly Unbelievable Case of What the Man-Eating Monsters Ate

    The town of Rock Springs, Wyoming has a violet past. Violent to the point it was long ago called "The Murder Capital of America," and it was a moniker deserved. The years have passed and the population has dwindled and with that, the violence has slowed down. Not stopped, mind you, as at least once a year someone shoots someone else for reasons fair or foul. But the residents didn't get shaken up about these sort of things. They had seen it all. At least, until the monsters came.

    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    The Mayor from Jaws Explains those Quotes he Gave Bob Woodward

    Everyone knows I want to be a cheerleader for Amity Island, right? You want to project confidence. So while I might have told some reporter from the mainland that we were facing “a  grotesque, Biblical monster of the deep,” “a bloody, churning nightmare of teeth,” or “a lean, mean tourist-eating machine,” there was no reason to tell the general public that. You don’t want to start a panic, fellas. Just think of the kids.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    I know Why the Caged Man Cries for Sports

    At the age of eight, I enjoyed being in school plays and funny things. I loved cartoons, especially off-the-wall ones like Heckle & Jeckle. I adored H.R. Pufnstuf, without knowing a thing about the obvious drug references. My childhood bedroom door was covered in silly and gross Wacky Package stickers. I wrote silly little plays and dialogues. And when my Dad asked me if I wanted to play Little League Baseball, I said no.

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    U.S. Constitution hospitalized following suicide attempt

    WASHINGTON, D.C. – The United States Constitution, the long respected legal document of the United States government, is in serious condition at George Washington University Hospital, following a suicide attempt late last night. Sources close to the document say it despondently tried to shred itself in a nearby office shredder at approximately 11 p.m. Monday.

    librewolf's picture

    A Word of Caution for Those Rushing Out to Celebrate Their Release From 'Captivity'

    The pressure is on to "reopen" the economy (a misnaming of what needs to happen). The vision of what that means and the reality that will continue to evolve are in vast conflict. However, regardless of vision, there is a harsh reality that few seem to understand.

    It is more dangerous to be out in public now than at any time since January 22, when we first became aware that there was one person with the virus in the U.S.

    How many reading this are saying "Say WHAT!?"

    William K. Wolfrum's picture

    The COVID-19 Show on hiatus as ratings plummet and people leave their homes

    Despite stellar early ratings and a cast of guest stars that included Tom Hanks and Idris Elba, The COVID-19 Show is being put on hiatus due to dwindling viewership and a general lack of interest in the ongoing pandemic. Producers of the show will now retool it's format, but promise that the deaths will continue.

    “We feel that we can get interest in this virus back to where it was in the beginning,” said producer Michael Bay. “People are still in grave danger, but the plot just isn't pulling people in.”

    Trump COVID 19 Timeline, Updated

    1/6 - Chinese first describe the new virus.

    1/8 -CDC issues warning on virus, Intelligence community waving "red flags" as it "did before 9/11"

    1/14 - Trump has campaign rally, New Hampshire.

    librewolf's picture

    Living Clean and Reducing Risk of Infection

    We are living in a dangerous time, dealing with something the majority rarely, if ever, even consider – Fighting a contagious, and possibly deadly, microbe. It is a virus known as Covid-19. Many will be sickened, few will escape unscathed, and some of us will die. How many don’t die largely depends on their being able to protect themselves, but more importantly, it depends on the vigilance of everyone else. If you are in my place (the highest risk group) your heart just sank. And every time you watch/read/listen to the news your heart drops a bit further.

    I am not an expert, but I have been living with a double-lung transplant and suppressed immune system for going on 9 years. I also once worked for one of the largest sterilizer companies in the United States earlier in life. So here are my ideas, and what I am practicing, in these perilous times.

    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Fear, Loathing, and Pandemics

    An epidemic turns out to be a rotten time to have a germophobe President. Trump's more obvious pathologies -- ignorance, narcissism, magical thinking, pathological lying -- have gotten the obvious attention, because those are all real dangers to public safety. But Trump's germophobia makes him fundamentally unsuited to a public health crisis. His focus on making sure that he, personally, does not get ill, is just the mindset that increases the number of people who will. Selfishness helps an epidemic thrive. The outbreak can only be defeated by cooperation.

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    Wakeup: Trump Doesn't Need a Majority

    Wakeup call: Hitler was named Chancellor after getting only 36% of the vote.

    Gottwald in Czechoslovakia pulled a coup 2 years after the Communists got 38% of the vote.

    Boris Johnson just led the UK out of the EU with only 43.6% of the vote.

    Bush claimed a "mandate" after losing with only 47.9% of the vote, going to the Supreme Court to rubber stamp the vote theft.

    Trump's Russian & other pals helped him "win" 3 Midwest states by super thin margins via voter repression & hacking, and then block the investigations.

    Relying on the 2020 results to throw Trump out? Don't.

    When a man shows you what he's made of, believe him.

    Trump doesn't need to "win" - he just needs to stay in power. His cronies will help him do exactly that.

    Danger, Will Robinson, Danger.

    jollyroger's picture

    Before you board that chopper...

    Amid the widespread grief over Kobe Bryant's death, a small lesson in the evils of "regulatory capture" is manifest, and the rich and powerful should pay attention.

    Most of us are familiar with the alarms that sound when a plane is on a trajectory that in pilot-speak understatement, is designated "a controlled flight into terrain." As the situation grows more urgent, a voice will be  generated shouting "PULL UP! PULL UP! PULL UP!"

    The warning is generated by a device called a TAWS (Terrain Awareness and Warning System). It costs about $37,000, plus $7000 in lost revenue for the downtime required to install. If you were rich enough to own your own helicopter, you would certainly want it equipped with one. Bryant, evidently, did not own his own helicopter, but instead used charters for his frequent air commutes.

    Danny Cardwell's picture

    Kobe Bryant: He Touched Every Line

    I sat down to write about Kobe's life and contributions to the game, but a blank piece of paper kept staring back at me. I struggled to find the words to express the shock I felt. Watching the crowd in New Orleans pay respect to Kobe was emotional. Seeing the tears in the eyes of Celtics players was tough. I felt a sense of pride after seeing teams take 24 second shot clock violations. Trae Young's inspired 45-point performance while wearing the number 8 made me a fan of his for life. Those images are worth more than any words I could ever write.

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    Nikki Haley and the Confederacy

    Nikki Haley was hailed as one of the adults in the room when she joined the Trump administration. She went to disappoint expectations by becoming another Trump toadie.

    I’d thought Haley was better than that. I was wrong. She was one of the heroes in my 2016 book, Too Dumb to Fail: How the GOP Went from the Party of Reagan to the Party of Trump. Even after accepting a job in the Trump administration as ambassador to the United Nations, I hoped Haley could walk the tightrope of maintaining her dignity and reputation as a serious conservative while remaining relevant in a party that has become dramatically more populist and nationalistic in the Trump era. 

    Danny Cardwell's picture

    A Response To Second Amendment Sanctuary Counties

    Greetings fellow Dagbloggers. I hope you all are doing well. It's been a few weeks since the Commonwealth of Virginia turned BLUE. It's been 25 years since the Democrats controlled the Governor's mansion and both houses. This has already caused panic in some of the more conservative rural areas. Several counties are seeking to create "2nd Amendment Sanctuary Counties".

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    Danny Cardwell's picture

    How Should We Think About Impeachment?

    Impeachment hearings are here whether we want them or not. The next few weeks, like all of the weeks before them, will be full of misinformation and half truths. 

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    Warren Already Losing Swing States to Trump

    Nate Cohen, expert on polling and demographics:

    The results suggest that Ms. Warren, who has emerged as a front-runner for the Democratic nomination, might face a number of obstacles in her pursuit of the presidency. The poll supports concerns among some Democrats that her ideology and gender — including the fraught question of “likability” — could hobble her candidacy among a crucial sliver of the electorate. And not only does she underperform her rivals, but the poll also suggests that the race could be close enough for the difference to be decisive. link

    Warren will drop significantly more if nominated, from GOP attacks as a "tax raising big government elite east coast professor from Harvard", a "socialist", a "Maduro clone", "will turn America into Venezuela" etc. She has given the Republicans plenty of material to use against her in her 54 plans.  (yes, there are 54 of them) Even some of her single plans, like her 15,000+ word Medicare for All healthcare/tax plan make FDR's New Deal look like a business as usual continuing resolution. The Warren plan would kick 140 million or so off their current health care plans. Although some might not mind, millions who like their plans will mind. Many on Medicare may be concerned the system will go broke faster, leaving them at the end of the line.  Warren has no provision in the plan for anyone in the United States to pay anything per visit, which is an invitation to broken appointments and increased use of emergency rooms. There is no guarantee that doctors will not just opt out of the system and go full fee for service, causing further congestion at doctors still taking Medicare for All. It will overturn 18% of our economy and is sure to be a ripe target for all kinds of attacks from the Republicans and their PAC's.

    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Halloween Goofiness (Self-Promotion Edition)

    I have a new piece on McSweeney's Internet Tendency today, right on time for Halloween: "I Am Just Trying to Have a Civil Online Conversation about Vampires." Here's a taste:
     

    Doctor Cleveland's picture

    Why Booing Trump Matters

    Various elite media types clucked, scolded, and clutched their pearls after Donald Trump got booed at the World Series and some of the crowd spontaneously chanted "Lock him up!" Because when ordinary voters do it, it's "uncivil." When Trump does it, it's the Voice of the People. But the talking heads' discomfort was about something more important: cognitive dissonance. Trump being booed threatens their worldview. The American media cannot accept the fact that President Trump is unpopular.

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