For four long years Republicans have whined and carped about Obama's speeches. Speaking is Obama's only skill. Obama's eloquence just proves he's an empty suit. His admirers were mesmerized and taken in by pure rhetorical sleight-of-hand. Nothing to back it up. You can't create jobs with a speech. His speeches are all he has going. Yo, Mr. Speech. Speeches, Speeches...... 

But Republicans have a new take on Obama's speeches:  OBAMA DIDN'T BUILD THAT SPEECH. REPUBLICANS DID! 

Ann Romney built that speech!.

Chris Christie built that speech!.

And yet tonight, Paul what's his name from Wisconsin will make a speech. A Republican Party Hack's Speech. Ugh.

Suddenly a Speech is the most admired and important achievement in a Republican's life. Ann Romney's speech humanized Mitt Romney---which certainly qualifies it as the best speech in the history of Politics. Mitt was transformed more completely by a single speech than might have resulted from a blood transfusion, some electroshock, a bout of lipo suction and a face lift combined. Oh, the power of speech to transform! Ann Romney was eloquent, her speech not only defined her but her husband as well. We never realized that an eloquent speech could do that.   

Chris Christie built a speech. He pushed back from a plate of beef steak with mashed potatoes and gravy and  threw all of his bulk into that speech. Wasn't it Teddy Roosevelt, a famous Republican, who said, "Speak loudly and throw your fat fists."  Tonight I will talk about me, me, me---my fat body is my defense mechanism---I command respect. New Jersey! Got a prollen wid thatt? A speech that built the plan to tear everything down. Tear down women's rights, tear down the EPA, tear down subsidies to the poor. Christie built a speech to do all that! Brilliant.

Christie is going to launch a second American Century built on that Speech. A new economy built on that Speech. A heaping plate of spaghetti built on that Speech. Got a prollen wid that?

And Paul Ryan will build a Speech tonight. Bloomberg radio nailed it: "Ryan's Speech will tell us who the man is, what he's made of." Imagine that---a Speech which in and of itself is the sum total of a man's being! I'm amazed that a Speech can represent a man's essence. I am dumb struck by the sheer boldness of Republicans' new found worship of speech making. The utter power of a speech---how very original.   

I developed carpal tunnel syndrome today driving home and trying to flip my Sirius away from the blanket coverage of the Republican Speeches last night in Tampa. While hurricane Isaac was pounding Louisiana Christie was pounding his surprisingly small fat fists---bluntly, mind you (if I hear the word blunt one more time I might blunt my fist through a T.V. set.)  Is blunt the new drug for Republicans along with speechmaking? With daily doses of blunt will Republicans build even better fantasies, for example, about economics---like giving corporations even more tax breaks in order to create jobs when corporations are already sitting on a historically high pile of cash? 

Republicans have finally caught on to the idea of speeches. Perhaps now they will take the next logical step--put something into their speeches which tell us how to build something of lasting value---not just tear things down.  Build a road, a bridge, or a new levee in Plaquemines Parish in Louisiana. Will we build more walls around our ghettos or will we face up to inequalities which we all had a part in creating? Are we blind to the need to educate all children or do we just want to throw the poor ones back into bad neighborhoods with no chance to build a better life? 

Obama has been relentlessly criticized about his major speeches. Now Romney and his followers are sudden converts to the transformative potential of the big speech. Republicans have a new little erector set. So I'll go along with their new creativity. Change reality with a speech. Let's even pretend that making a speech can by itself restore an economy. Anyone want to bet me ten big on who can build the best speech?  Fat boy?