The Bishop and the Butterfly: Murder, Politics, and the End of the Jazz Age
    acanuck's picture

    Red alert! Canada has ability to make nuclear weapons

    By acanuck on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 5:11pm |

    For a full day, that's been one of the headlines over at the Drudge Report. Well, not actually about Canada -- it's about Iran, and it's attributed to Joint Chiefs of Staff chair Mike Mullen.

    As you might expect with Drudge, there's no corresponding headline linking to the interview that Mullen's boss, Defense Secretary Robert Gates, rushed to give out that same day, contradicting Mullen and stating unequivocally  that Iran is nowhere close to making a nuclear weapon. Here's a link: http://www.reuters.com/article/topNews/idUSTRE5201Y920090301

    The Drudge headline even misrepresents what Mullen said; he spoke not of Iran having the "ability" to make a weapon but of having "enough material" for one. And that's technically true -- if it were to reprocess all its 1,000 kilograms of low-enriched uranium into highly enriched uranium, it could build one bomb. Very difficult -- and impossible to conceal -- but feasible.

    But guess what? That's true for dozens of countries. Most don't even need to go through the technical hassle of enriching the stuff to weapons grade. Canada, for example, has enough highly enriched uranium already stockpiled to make up to four bombs. (Right now, it uses the stuff to make medical isotopes.)

    Leaving aside the nuclear warheads that already exist, there's something like 20 metric tonnes of highly enriched uranium scattered around the world -- in civilian nuclear reactors, hospitals, research facilities. That's enough for about 600 Hiroshima-style bombs, give or take a couple of hundred.

    Oh, but don't worry about any of that falling into the wrong hands. Iran's the only real danger! Listen to Drudge, and to Mullen, and to the other crazies who are still hoping to gin up another senseless war.

    Comments

    It's probably why we are keeping an eye on Canada with Predator drones.

    Yankee Magazine has an exellent article on Homeland Security's "improvements" along the New England - Canada border. Vast sums being spent in the wilderness, largely to inconvenience residents on both sides.


    by Merrill (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 6:36pm

    The Predators are mostly for show. As long as they aren't armed with Hellfire missiles, I'm cool with them.
    If the U.S. were really worried about our use of highly enriched uranium, it could just turn off the supply. Canada doesn't do any enriching on its own.
    Of course, then we'd stop selling you the medical isotopes your hospitals rely on. And maybe even the bulk of the raw uranium you need for your reactors; Canada exports almost one-third of the world's supply.


    by acanuck (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 6:52pm

    I think we're less afraid of Canadian nukes because the nukes wear plaid flannel shirts and hats with ear flaps and say yup a lot.


    by amike (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 6:57pm

    Actually, they wear took, and say "eh?" a lot.

    =D


    by Bwakfat (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 7:15pm

    That would be tuques (toques, en francais).
    Get it right, eh?


    by acanuck (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 7:25pm

    Their population is massing on our borders even now. Didn't any of you see "Canadian Bacon"?


    by The Old Grouch (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 7:30pm

    We only mass on the border because it gets warmer the farther south you go. If we ever succeed in taking over Florida, we'll all move there overnight.


    by acanuck (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 7:54pm

    When you all go to Florida, I'm grabbing the Hacker Hellstorm.


    by The Old Grouch (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 8:15pm

    Who needs Predators to stop illegal border crossing when you have the Zone of Death?

    Makes marching on Moscow look like a piece of cake.


    by quinn esq (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 9:36pm

    "We'll all try to stay serene and calm, when Alabama gets the Bomb..."

    Iran would indeed need to either re-refine the low-enriched uranium, or cook it in a reactor to yield plutonium. Uranium is not useful for lightweight, missile-launched weapons, although if one has enough no testing is needed for the simple gun bomb of Little Boy fame. Plutonium weapons are the big leagues, requiring the best machining, metallurgy, electronics, and testing.

    Iran could mount a plutonium warhead on a long-range missile, but that is precisely what Iran is farthest away from producing. The Bushehr reactor is sill not running, and producing weapons-grade fuel would require observable refueling operations, replacing rods before they become too contaminated with non-useful Pu isotopes.

    And let us remember that the only use of nukes against a country was when one was not a nuclear power---keep things cool, Canada, you have a scary southern neighbor with a history of violence.


    by Tom Wright (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 11:29pm

    Ah, we always loved Canada. At least after the revolutionary war, and so many centuries have elapsed. But you are truly our friends. And I really actually know a canuck, Q that is, and he will tell you what great friends we are and how we just hope the best to all the Canadian friends, even though you talk funny at times, only kidding really, and we always liked Second City and all of your humor and all of your free thinking or free basing; well you know what I mean. And I have always enjoyed visiting your land with my Dl in hand so that I could sample your tobacco products and prescription medicines, although you know I am handicapped but your doctors see me anyway and I sure do like Canada.

    So if you in Canada get mad or something, uh..er..it is all Texas...it is their fault and you should kind of key in to that terrible country that we in Minnesota have nothing to do with. You know. I mean if you ever seek the nuclear option so to speak.


    by dickday (not verified) on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 11:40pm

    Thanks for posting what I didn't get around to!

    I was appalled at the headline I saw.


    by eds (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 12:37am

    You should credit Tom Lehrer for your quote.


    by erichayes (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 12:41am

    This is why we can't trust you with nukes. French. Hoo Boy!


    by Bwakfat (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 1:06am

    Don't trust the Canukistani! Retaliate!


    by Flying Spaghett... (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 1:08am

    Medical isotopes? That's a euphemism for something, I just know it.


    by Orlando (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 1:10am

    Canada is the real sleeper threat. First your Canada geese take out our aircraft, now stockpiling nuclear weapons. How about we just roll over and let you guys take us over if we can have healthcare?


    by dijamo (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 1:13am

    I thought you smoked them.


    by Bwakfat (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 1:27am

    Simple misunderstanding, no need for alarm.

    Acanuck meant "medical isotoque."


    by quinn esq (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 2:15am

    And they know how to regulate banks, too. Can I surrender right now?


    by Steve LaBonne (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 2:35am

    Assumed it went without saying.


    by Tom Wright (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 2:37am

    Hey! Second City got its start in Chicago - the Canadian troupe came later.


    by The Old Grouch (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 2:48am

    Well, we did drive back the expeditionary force that briefly occupied Montreal during the revolutionary war.
    Then in the 1812-1814 unpleasantness, we engaged in a little tit-for-tat. I believe you burned Toronto and we burned the White House.
    Fair exchange.
    But you're right; we're pals now.
    So far.


    by acanuck (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 2:58am

    We will be crossing the border at Buffalo on July 1st this year (Canada Day). By July 4th, the US of A will just be another Province. Advantages will be better beer, better health care and better banking system.


    by jimlscotland (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 3:13am

    Health care is the loss leader.

    Beer's the moneymaker.


    by quinn esq (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 5:39am

    Too late, Marquis. Street by street, town by town, Canada is creeping South. Lenny Cohen told you how it was gonna go down.

    First we take Manhattan...

    Then we take the sensible parts of the country.


    by quinn esq (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 5:41am

    We're gonna have to phase it in. First five years, all newcomers get free podiatry.

    That outta hold things 'til we can train up enough psychiatrists to handle Orlando.


    by quinn esq (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 5:45am

    When we were kids, we used to enjoy hiking up the DEW line. Remember that? Distant Early Warning system in case the Russkies came over the Pole?

    Anyway, we'd get bored, nothin' much to do on a weekend, so we'd hike up to the DEW line, then dare each other to touch the electrified fence with a stick. Sparks EVERYWHERE! So cool! And then the B-52's would come roaring overhead, and we'd all flop on the grass and giggle.

    Well, it WAS good fun... until you guys took out Vladivostock. Man, did my Mum give me a tanning.

    Won't do THAT again.


    by quinn esq (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 5:50am

    Throughout most of the 1960s, Canada was a reluctant nuclear-armed power.
    It bought into the U.S.-made Bomarc anti-aircraft missile system, which worked best when fitted with nuclear warheads. It was assumed Russian bombers would come over the Pole in streams, and a 7-kiloton aerial blast would take out many aircraft at a time.
    Canada operated the missiles, but the warheads remained U.S. property. So American approval was required to arm and detonate them. The system obviously never saw action.
    One of Canada's two Bomarc bases was at La Macaza, Quebec, and concerned antiwar students from Montreal used to organize picket-style protests up in the north woods. Ah, those were heady days.


    by acanuck (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 6:48am

    Are you people ever going to stop your insufferable gloating over the War of 1812? 'Tween that and having the better half of Niagra Falls and the alarming news that you've now developed fully functioning deliverable newkyaler weapons, its enough to make us want to invade you again. Third time's the charm. We'll pencil it in for after we're done with the other two wars we're in (including the one your in with us).


    by The Commenter F... (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 1:02pm

    Danger alert! He's on tour again...


    by The Old Grouch (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 1:25pm

    Excellent! And lest you Canucks think America has nothing to bring to the table, you can oust Harper and Obama will be the President of the United States of AmeriCanada. I love it when a plan comes together!


    by dijamo (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 2:55pm

    Just don't burn the White House again.


    by matyra (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 3:37pm

    Poor Guy ! A touching story .

    That could have been any of us !


    by BrianSkuse (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 4:09pm

    When Governor-General Michaelle Jean greeted Obama on his arrival in Ottawa, she reportedly reminded him that his popularity in Canada (about 90%) exceeded his U.S. approval rate.
    Obama replied something like, "Great. If I screw up as president, I'll have a country I can move to."
    So your proposal is not out of the question.


    by acanuck (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 9:55pm

    Quinn, I would need a whole team of psychiatrists to help me figure out why. No offense, but it's freaking cold up there. And I don't like your beer.


    by Orlando (not verified) on Tue, 03/03/2009 - 11:22pm