William K. Wolfrum's picture

    Chicken-Suit Wearers say “What the Cluck?” about Nevada Polling ban

    If you show up in a chicken suit at a Nevada polling place to have your say in the primaries, you will not be allowed to vote. And this has chicken-suit wearers across the state molting in anger.

    “It’s like I live in Soviet Russia,” said Tim Johnson of Sparks, Nev. “I moved here from Tupelo to get away from this kind of cultural totalitarianism.”

    Johnson is one of thousands of chicken-suit wearers across Nevada that have come forward.outraged over the fact that they will be banned from polling stations. Little was known about chicken-suit wearers until the rule was put into effect, but Johnson said there is a huge chicken-suit wearing community throughout the country.

    “Oh, there’s a lot of us,” said Johnson. “Think about it, how many people do you see daily in chicken suits. It’s really an inordinate amount, isn’t it?”

    Republican Senate candidate Sue Lowden continued her efforts in being the most literally conservative candidate in the nation, as she proposed a duel to settle the issue.

    “I say a duel is the best solution,” said Lowden. “After that the menfolk can get together and go on a hunt.”

    –WKW

    Crossposted at William K. Wolfrum Chronicles

    Comments

    Meh. Satire aside, it seems like a reasonble decision. I agree with the judge that anyone wearing a chicken-suit to a polling place would obviously be making an anti-Lowden statement, so I think banning chicken-suit costumes is consistent with banning other forms of advocacy.


    Seriously.  As long as the ban doesn't encompass gorilla suits, who cares?


    That's easy for you to say. You didn't just drop two grand on a professional-grade chicken suit.


    Is this a bad time to quote Martin Neimöller?


    Hilarious


    Latest Comments