…and there shall be weeping and the gnashing of teeth.

As a NYC cosmetic dentist, I see a lot of cheek biting. Some cases are simply accidental, some cases are chronic, yet have easily remedied medical reasons, and some are physiological in nature. Let's go over a few reasons/causes:

The first cause of cheek biting is what I call "careless chewing." It's something we all probably do from time to time. It's when you're chewing and usually trying to do something else -- talking, reaching for something, reading etc. Talking is really the biggest culprit here (be it far from me to admonish people for reading while eating -- my newspaper is a staple at lunch). This can be remedied by perhaps paying a little more attention to chewing, slowing down while eating, and similar.

But again, this is something we all probably do. Thus, an occasional cheek/lip bite is usually not a cause for concern.

More problematic is chronic cheek biting, usually due to some sort of misalignment in your teeth, or perhaps due to TMJ (temporomandibular joint disorder). This is quite common in some people -- misaligned teeth cause our bites to be "off," and can cause an occasional nip to the cheek/tongue/lips.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/thomas-p-connelly-dds/cheek-biting-_b_818047.html

BULLSHITE!!!

Here are some reasons that I bite my cheeks!!!

The Pentagon paid hundreds of billions of dollars to defense contractors engaged in criminal or civil fraud -- in some cases paying the companies after they were convicted, according to a new Defense Department report.

At least 91 contractors holding contracts worth $270 billion were the subjects of civil fraud judgments -- and in some cases criminal fraud convictions as well, many of which resulted in fines, suspensions or debarments. Even so, Defense Department contracting officers still assigned $4.9 billion worth of work with these companies after the fraud was uncovered, the report said.

http://www.politicsdaily.com/2011/02/03/pentagon-admits-to-billions-of-dollars-in-contractor-fraud/

So they know who the frickin felons are and they give them MORE CONTRACTS.

So now I need to wash more blood out of my mouth!

Former Rep. Mark Foley (R-FL), the ex-Congressman who infamously resigned in 2006 as a result of a scandal involving his sexually explicit instant message conversations with male Congressional pages, is making his way back out into the public eye. As the Palm Beach Post reports, he spoke last week -- at a meeting of the Palm Beach County Young Republicans.

In addition, the paper notes, he gave an introduction speech this past Tuesday for freshman GOP Rep. Allen West, who hails form a neighboring district, at the grand opening of West's district office in West Palm Beach.

As the paper reports:

There was criticism when the Young Republicans announced via Twitter and Facebook that Foley would be speaking at last week's meeting in West Palm Beach.

"Have you people lost your minds?" one critic tweeted.

But Young Republicans President Jackie Fay said Foley was a hit.

http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/2011/02/mark_foley_appears_with_local_young_republicans_al.php?ref=fpb

Okay, I mean do you have to be 18 in order to be a member of the Young Repubs?

Oh God almighty, I just bit my tongue. I bit my tongue and I am not even in seizure! Damn!

"Sarah Palin is a soap opera, basically. She's doing mostly what she does to make money and keep her name in the news," Ron Reagan said.

"She is not a serious candidate for president and never has been," said Reagan, a political independent whose politics lean left.

But former Reagan speechwriter Kenneth Khachigian praised the choice of Palin to discuss Reagan's legacy.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/02/05/palin-america-reagan_n_819073.html

At last some clarity to the world news!

The American Civil Liberties Union is calling for an independent investigation into all prisoner deaths at Guantanamo Bay after a 48-year-old Afghan detainee collapsed and died.  

The U.S. military said the prisoner, Awal Gul, died of “apparent natural causes” on Tuesday, collapsing in the shower after working out on an elliptical machine. Military spokesman Army Col. Scott Malcom said the death was still under investigation but that an autopsy completed Thursday appeared to indicate a heart attack or a pulmonary embolism as the cause…

 “Given the lack of transparency at Guantanamo, each and every death there should be fully and independently investigated

http://weaselzippers.us/2011/02/05/aclu-calls-for-investigation-into-unfortunate-gitmo-death-of-taliban-commander/

This poor guy had 18 kids.

Now I say poor guy. Hell, he might have been planning to blow up America for chrissakes.

BUT HOW IN THE HELL ARE WE TO KNOW THAT?

My God, this time I lost a tooth!

Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.) signaled what she sees as her "motivation in life" at a Republican dinner in Montana over the weekend.

"I take my first political breath every morning with one thought in mind," the Tea Party darling told her audience, the Missoulian reports. "Repeal Obamacare... That's my motivation in life."

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/02/06/michele-bachmann-reveals-_n_819269.html

She wakes up whispering Obamacare and socialism?

I mean I have awoken staring into her ugly face as if she were some spector sent to me by Satan; and thrown up. And of course my gums ache!!!

WASHINGTON — Sarah Palin says the Obama administration must tell Americans what it knows about who will be Egypt's next leader.

In a Christian Broadcasting Network interview released Saturday, the 2008 vice presidential candidate says the administration should level with the American people on what it knows about the Egyptian crisis.

Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak wants to rule until September elections.

Palin said the U.S. must find out who is "behind all the turmoil" and that "we should not stand" for a government led by the Muslim Brotherhood.

Referencing a 2008 campaign ad, Palin said Egypt was the White House's "3 a.m. phone call" but it "went right to the answering machine."

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/02/06/sarah-palin-obama-egypt_n_819230.html

http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/02/05/palin-criticizes-obama-on-egypt/

Yeah, just what America needs, some advice from Palin on international affairs.

OKAY NOW I GOT LOCK-JAW.

Anybody got a straw?