( Editors Note: 74% of all white voters in South Carolina voted against Barack Obama in the 2008 presidential election.)

Tea Party" leader Mark Williams appeared on a CNN panel on "Anderson Cooper 360" last night and promptly set to work discrediting himself and his movement. Williams denounced those carrying blatantly racist signs against President Obama during the tea parties as "no more part of the mainstream of America than the hippies who wear nipple clips and feather boas in San Francisco streets during so-called peace demonstrations."

Cooper had done his homework, however, and caught Williams blatantly misrepresenting himself: "What you're saying makes sense to me here when I'm hearing what you say but then I read on your blog, you say, you call the President an Indonesian Muslim turned welfare thug and a racist in chief."

Williams shrugs and responds, "Yeah, that's the way he's behaving." An incredulous Cooper asks Williams if he really believes Obama is an Indonesian Muslim and a welfare thug. The tea party leader digs the hole a little deeper: "He's certainly acting like it. Until he embraces the whole country what else can I conclude."

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/09/15/tea-party-leader-melts-do_n_286933.html

Drudge, through its subsidiary DALAUN (Drudge Against Liberals And Against Uppity Negros) has just completed a six month study on racial issues in this country. The results are startling. It turns out that no one is really 'color blind' at all.

The study was exhaustive covering fifty states as well as Guam.  When asked why they decided to include Guam in the mix, Colonel Robert E. Lee, formerly of the 532nd and currently Assistant to the Assistant to Matt Drudge said:

I had been stationed on Guam over ten years ago and never had a finer time.  This important survey gave me the opportunity to return and see if he could relive those days of yesteryear. Turns out I only 'discovered' the worst hangover of my life along with a new order for child support. Geeeeeeeeeez

Survey Methods

Results are based on telephone interviews with 1,021,453 national adults, aged 18 and older, as well as in person 'blind' interviews with 679,789 national adults, aged 18 and older; both methods conducted Feb. 10, 2009 through September 10, 2009. For results based on the total sample of national adults, one can say with 95% confidence that the maximum margin of sampling error is ±3 percentage points. For a measly $300,000 more, we could have given you a 96.5% confidence with a sampling error of 2.5 percentage points but noooooooooooo. Drudge said it needed the money to print special invites to members of Fox News to its Fall Extravaganza.  C'est la vie.

Phone interviews are conducted with respondents on land-line telephones (for respondents with a land-line telephone) and cellular phones (for respondents who are cell-phone only).

In person interviews were conducted in the following manner:

Subjects were selected randomly from telephone books. This part of the study was blind. The interviewee was led into a dark room after electrical tape covered his/her eyes. The interviewer was certifiably blind as indicated by a government agency. No dogs were allowed during the interview.

In addition to sampling error, question wording and practical difficulties in conducting surveys can introduce error or bias into the findings of public opinion polls. We were paid so much money to conduct this survey that we kind of like to down play this disclaimer.

One caveat. All interviewees had to supply a DL or a DL number. So most alcoholics, epileptics and blind people were omitted from the survey results. But who cares really since alcoholics, epileptics and blind people are not real Americans anyway. Picture ID's, that's what I always say.

Jewish people were allowed to participate but we sure the hell made an awful lot of surveys were taken on Saturdays.

CHAPTER ONE: SOUTH CAROLINA AND TEABAGGERS

PATTERNS

http://cheezburger.com/View.aspx?aid=2634717696

http://cheezburger.com/View.aspx?aid=2634749952

http://cheezburger.com/View.aspx?aid=2634808064

These patterns are indeed startling. Now, while it is true that our polling organization is just learning the basics of pie chart methodology, certain patterns emerge. However we leave any conclusions to the readers.

OTHER SURVEY RESULTS

The following questions were asked of all participants:

1.               Are you a teabagger or have you ever participated in teabagging?

THE SURVEY SAID:

A.    Yes, I am a teabagger........................................001%

B.    Yes I have participated as a teabagger.....................002%

C.    Once in Cincinnati but I really liked the guy..............0004%

D.    What the hell is a teabagger?......................................40%

E.     Afternoons and some weekends............................59%

2.               Do you like teabaggers?

THE SURVEY SAID:

A.    yes I like teabaggers........................................ 09%

B.    No I hate teabaggers.........................................55%

C.    What the hell is a teabagger?......................................35%

D.    Once in Cincinnati but I really liked the guy..............0004%

3.               Do you like Barack Obama?

       THE SURVEY SAID:

A.     Yes, I like Barack Obama................................61%

B.      No I do not like Barack Obama.........................30%

C.      Can we just lynch the son of a bitch?......................06%

D.     Who the hell is Barack Obama?...............................02%    

E.      I think he is the greatest golfer who ever lived..........01%

On his radio show yesterday, Beck declared, "You can't convince me that the founding fathers wouldn't allow you to secede. The constitution is not a suicide pact. ...

RUSH:  Hey, look, folks, the white kid on that bus in Belleville, Illinois, he deserved to be beat up.  You don't know about this story?  Oh, there's video of this.  The school bus filled with mostly black students beat up a white student a couple of times with all the black students cheering.  Of course the white student on the bus deserved the beating.  He was born a racist.  That's what Newsweek magazine told us in its most recent cover.  It's Obama's America, is it not?  Obama's America, white kids getting beat up on school buses now.  You put your kids on a school bus, you expect safety but in Obama's America the white kids now get beat up with the black kids cheering, "Yay, right on, right on, right on, right on," and, of course, everybody says the white kid deserved it, he was born a racist, he's white.  Newsweek magazine told us this.  We know that white students are destroying civility on buses, white students destroying civility in classrooms all over America, white congressmen destroying civility in the House of Representatives.  
http://www.rushlimbaugh.com/home/daily/site_091509/content/01125106.gues...