As the U.S. Congress debates a four-year extension of the Patriot Act and political figures such as Dick Cheney, Karl Rove, and Peter King (R-NY) clamor to take credit for the effectiveness of enhanced interrogation techniques (torture) in the finding and killing of Osama bin Laden, perhaps this is a good opportunity for the United States to examine its torture options.

Military interrogators and former torture victim John McCain (R-AZ) disagree with Cheney and others on the effectiveness of torture.  They say torture is ineffective and the quality of information obtained under torture is poor.  The interrogators do, however, universally agree that torture of terrorists is a superlative recruiting tool to create more terrorists.  More terrorists - more torture.

Torture is a growth industry and it is self-perpetuating.

We need to make it a permanent part of the American way of life.  This could be the economic boon that replaces our lost manufacturing and high technology jobs that have been shipped overseas by multi-national corporations.

America would also benefit because we could declare anyone an enemy combatant and dispense with our tired old criminal justice system.  We could streamline the justice system bypassing the quaint notions of probable cause, evidence, Miranda rights, the right to trial, the right to an attorney, and witnesses.  Instead, we could torture individuals, get them to confess to anything, and detain them indefinitely.

Think of the growth in the prison industry which is already being privatized, has lobbyists for prison corporations and prison guard unions influencing legislators for mandatory sentencing laws ("Three Strikes and You're Out"), and underpaid judges receiving bribes to pronounce heavier sentences for citizens guilty of petty offenses.

Think of the growth in the demand for interrogators.  Ethical paragons like Harvard Business School and Liberty University could start the John Su Schools of Torture and endow a Guantanamo Bay Chair.

Think of the savings from not wasting money and time on due process and trials.

And since private industry is so much more efficient than the government, we should privatize torture and turn it over to free-enterprise no-bid contracts like Halliburton or Blackwater (Xe).    They could interrogate citizens for comparable or higher costs to taxpaying Americans and dispense of burdensome labor laws and public accountability.  Since these corporations are people, too, we can protect their torture with the Bill of Rights and keep OSHA the EPA, and the entire U.S. Government at bay because we can't infringe upon the corporations' rights to be secure in their homes and unreasonable search and seizure.

Let me explain, if torture is privatized, the private corporations could avoid expensive public pensions, collective bargaining, the Freedom of Information Act, and work rules that would otherwise hamper government operations.  Of course, it would be advantageous for torture corporations to locate in right-to-work states.

Private corporations could pay minimum wage for its interrogators (until we finally get rid of this government intrusion into free commerce) and realize profits whereas government torture is simply a drain on public resources.  The wealthy shareholders would benefit and re-invest their profits into American growth industries such as surveillance, prisons, armaments, lobbying, and campaign contributions.  Think of the jobs that will trickle down to America.

It's a win-win proposition.

We should then eliminate Federal income taxes for torture corporations because of the inherent risks in their industry.  And to mitigate the risk, we can exempt the directors and officers of the torture corporations from liability from their decisions and deaths.

Think Massey Energy for the enhanced interrogation industry.

In order to assure the solvency of America's newest growth industry, we should supplement the tax breaks and indemnification from their actions with subsidies to protect them from foreign competition.  We need to protect the torture corporations from competitors in China, Iran, Somalia, Myanmar, and other low-cost torture countries.   We need to keep the jobs in America, so let's heed the words of future torture lobbyists and subsidize the operations of torture corporations.  This will assure the flow of funds from torture corporations to American political campaigns.

You win, we win, America wins.

Now, I know the liberal progressive socialist Soros-financed readers amongst you are concerned about torture and the U.S. Constitution -- specifically, the Bill of Rights.

Nonsense, I say.  We go to war without the approval of Congress.  We already detain people without a speedy trial, access to a lawyer, and without habeus corpus in general.  We have a death warrant on an American citizen without a trial or military hearing.  We wiretap without warrants. We can now use the U.S. military against U.S. citizens on U.S. soil.

Don't let the Constitution and Bill of Rights stand in the way of corporate profits from torture.  Corporations are people, too.  They have rights and lawyers to prove it.

Support corporate torture -- there's money to be made.  And that's good for America.

Tim Danahey is the host of "The Tim Danahey Show" on www.CastleRockRadio.com and can be contacted on the nascent www.TheTimDanaheyShow.com web page