The Bishop and the Butterfly: Murder, Politics, and the End of the Jazz Age
    Richard Day's picture

    AN ETHICAL QUANDRY CONCERNING POTATOES

    By Richard Day on Mon, 10/23/2017 - 2:42am |

    I have resided at this turret for over 11 years.

    I keep to myself.

    Basically, I feel that most folks feel better that I keep to myself.

    Seven years ago, I receive a check for a couple/three grand from the great US of A but I cannot find

    a bank to cash it.

    My driver's license had lapsed. Which was okay since I had not driven an automobile for years.

    Anyway, one needs proper identification in order to cash a check or even set up an account.

    Well, I make some inquiries and discover that I need to get to the other side of town and pay $26.50 in cash in order to properly renew my license.

    Well, I did not have $26.50 and I was in a quandary. hahahahah

    So I am having a fit and I end up in the Community Room of my turret and there is this lady who lives on my floor.

    And out of desperation, I introduce myself to her and ask her to lend me $27.00 for four hours. hahahaha

    And you know what?

    She says:

    WHY NOT?

    So she gives me the funds and I walk over to the other side of town: I get in line at the local DOT (in this town that means there was one person in front of me) and I renew my license.

    In the same mall where the DOT resided, I find a bank and open up an account and now I have a couple hundred bucks. And I had not seen a couple hundred bucks in years. hahahha

    So I walk back a few miles with all this cash and I find Rosie, the lady who saved my life.

    I pay her back.

    For the next few weeks I would leave cigs at her door.

    hahahahhah

    Well Rosie left the turret four years ago.

    But she moved within a few blocks of her old residence.

    Anyway, eight months ago or so, in the midst of winter I am at the Super One and there is Rosie.

    She says hi and following a short conversation, she agrees to drive me home.

    Now this is a big deal to me.

    I am now enabled to purchase fifty bucks worth of groceries, because I do not have to carry them home.

    So I purchase everything I can in the store and there she appears at the check out lane following my enormous purchase.

    So we somehow put all of our goods in the cart and I push this package to her car and she begins a discussion with the couple in the car next to hers.

    And, what do I do?

    I let go of the cart for some goddamnable reason and it runs into their car. hahahahahah

    And Rosie is not happy.

    And the couple looks at their bumper.

    Anyway, it all works out well and Rosie takes me home. And I carry five bags of groceries up to my apartment.

    AND I AM EMBARRASSED. HAHAHHAAH

    So every time I visit my local grocer I think:

    JESUS I HOPE I DO NOT RUN INTO ROSIE!

    So yesterday I meander to the grocers and I purchase my necessities, being careful to keep my purchase under $30.00 so that I might carefully carry everything home.

    HEY, HEY?

    I hear this voice and there is Rosie.

    OH MY GOD:

     

    I thought for sure that Rosie would have figured out the greatest conundrum of all time:

    No good deed goes....

    Oh well, nothing can go bad here.

    So I say:

    Hi Rosie

    You want a ride home?

    So, I am thinking that all is good and I submit, knowing that I am going to get bit in the ass. hahahahha

    So I have access to the back seat of the car, which is clear of baggage (although there are bags on the floor) and I place my bags there on the seat.

    And Rosie and I have small talk and everything seems fine.

    And I arrive at my turret and I open up the back door and I pull out my bags and I thank Rosie and I proceed into the structure with my goods and ultimately into my apartment.

    And guess what?

    I put away my goods and discover ten pounds of potatoes I never purchased.

    UGH

    So I have ten pounds of taters sitting by my door.

    So I go to the manager's office.

    And there is Tricia.

    Now Rosie hates Tricia and Tricia has no love for Rosie.

    Except I have no address for Rosie and I have no telephone number.

    So I explain what happened to Tricia. 

    hahahaha

    You must have some number for Rosie.

    Of course you cannot give the number to me.

    hahahahaha

    But you might call her and tell her that I have her potatoes.

    And if you wish, Dick will leave the potatoes or seven bucks (or whatever) here for your retrieval?

    hahahahah

    WHAT'S A MOTHER TO DO?

    Here I am in a philosophical quandary...

    I mean no warrants will issue, of this I am sure.

    WHAT THE HELL AM I TO DO WITH THESE POTATOES?

    I have memorized many recipes, of course.

    I mean I can bake them, and I might mash them and I might stew them and....

    BUT THAT WOULD BE WRONG!

    These are not my potatoes.

    hahahahahahahahah

    And yet, if these taters are not used within a certain time period, well they are lost forever.

    JUST A THOUGHT

    This is the type of inanity that I am forced to live with daily. hahhaha

    Who gives one fuck about Trump or taxes or anything, really?

    The folks in control have nothing to do with my life.

    My SS increased ten bucks over the last two years and so did my Medicare payment.

    THE END

    What am I to do with these potatoes and what the hell time is it anyway?

     

    Comments

    Hi Richard.  That's some story!. I'll bet Rosie knows exactly where her potatoes landed, but I'm picturing you hauling that 10 lb bag up the stairs, only to realize you had an extra 10 lb load to bear.  Good for you for making it into a story instead of flinging the damn spuds out the window.  That's what makes you you.  Lol. heart


    by Ramona on Mon, 10/23/2017 - 7:10am

    Oh I awaken to Ramona. ha

    Only you or Mr. Smith would bother about potatoes. hahahah

    I hope you are doing well. I shall proceed to your more relevant blog.

    Thank you.


    by Richard Day on Mon, 10/23/2017 - 12:01pm

    heartheartheart


    by Ramona on Mon, 10/23/2017 - 1:39pm

    I think you should start eating them.
    Keep tabs of value consumed versus what remains if Rosie is in a position to reclaim during the process.
    She trusted you with one extension of credit. This is the same but now you can eat it too. Like cake but more like potatoes.
    Use tact, poise, and reason.


    by moat on Mon, 10/23/2017 - 8:17pm

    Katy lied. hahahahah

    Steely Dan for chrissakes. hahahaha

    Well, your conclusion is good and well argumented.

    I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING.

    the end


    by Richard Day on Tue, 10/24/2017 - 1:38pm

    Ab fab story. I got no advice. You are on your own.

    But do want to share a favorite of one of my online news board pals from pre-TPM Cafe days. He was a nice young Quebecois trying to get more fluent in English. He and I liked to swap North Korean propanganda. The Potato Song was his favorite. I betcha you're gonna love it, too:

     

     

    Oh then there was the 100-yr old neighbor a few doors down, quite spry for her age.. Would get her groceries on the bus! Still, warned me getting old was "no party." And she did not make it to 101. Last thing I remember her saying to me when I saw her out watering, was when I asked her if I could get her anything at the store "they still got that bag of potatoes on sale for 99 cents? Get me one of those."

     


    by artappraiser on Mon, 10/23/2017 - 9:38pm

    Wonderful AA.

    Strange.

    But all of us peeps are strange; at least to other folks.

    I dunno, I am captivated by this little girl!


    by Richard Day on Tue, 10/24/2017 - 1:42pm

    Dick Day!! Nice to see you still writing. Hope all's well.

    FWIW, 10lb of potatoes usually costs less than $3.00 around here ... I can't imagine it's that much more in your neck of the woods. Great bang-for-your buck food.

    As for *what* to do with them, sometimes I'll bake them and then freeze them ... then grate them up for hashbrowns as needed (pro tip: if the potato is *too* frozen, wait a couple minutes before grating). ;-)

     


    by Anonymous kgb (not verified) on Fri, 01/05/2018 - 2:30am

    Not me - I'm an ingrate.

    PS - recommendation is to put potatoes in a paper bag, not in the fridge as the starch turns to sugar.

    Oh, and the bit about potatoes being fattening is an urban myth - they're mostly water, which is why they freeze. But deep fry them for french fries, etc, that's a different matter....


    by PeraclesPlease on Mon, 01/08/2018 - 9:41am

    Potatoes are nothing more than the most efficient way to get large quantities of fat and salt in your diet whether you use like a sponge to suck up grease by deep frying or add a half stick of butter to a baked potato. You could use a sponge or a paper towel to suck up the grease and then suck it out of the sponge but potatoes have the advantage of having basically no taste to get in the way of the fat and salt consumption.


    by ocean-kat on Mon, 01/08/2018 - 11:18am

    Or you can put a bit of ketchup or mustard a boiled or baked potato and it's not "large quantities of fat" - perhaps just salt & pepper depending on what the main dish is, or some toned down gravy (vegetarian, of course...)

    Been a long time since I did that butter or margarine thing. Even bread needs butter/margarine in traditional American thinking - hard to fathom the French baguette w or w/o cheese...


    by PeraclesPlease on Mon, 01/08/2018 - 11:53am

    Well of course you don't have to use 4 or 5 tablespoons of butter. You can use several spoons full of sour creme  instead. wink I've always found that the sour taste gets in the way of a full appreciation of the unadulterated taste of the fat.

    eta: I'm sure that there's an occasions stoic that eats a baked potato with nothing but salt and  pepper. Just as there are likely a few people who still wear hair shirts or flagellate themselves.


    by ocean-kat on Mon, 01/08/2018 - 12:15pm

    You've read my bio?


    by PeraclesPlease on Mon, 01/08/2018 - 1:10pm

    I have no idea what you have started here?

    First of all, there has been a mistake.

    The bag of taters ended up being only 5lbs as they say.

    Secondly, two or three bucks sounds about right.

    Thirdly (is thirdly a word?) I just felt bad when I discovered my thievery. (is that a word?)

    Fourthly, why does anybody care? hahahahahahhah

    Evidently folks do not like my new series which I will continue even though my son says to scrap it.

    hahahah

    Anyway, time has passed and peeps seem jolly!


    by Richard Day on Mon, 01/08/2018 - 2:13pm