The Bishop and the Butterfly: Murder, Politics, and the End of the Jazz Age
    Richard Day's picture

    THE WEDDING

    By Richard Day on Sun, 09/08/2013 - 3:26pm |

    The Spanish Wedding

    My new daughter-in-law finally made an honest man of my son!

    My beautiful granddaughter is no longer a bastard. (or is it bastardess?) Hahahahahah

    I told my brother that in Victorian England with all the prudence? that 80% of the 'public' (read unwashed) never married and the Law of Bastardy applied only to the inbred aristocracy. haaah

    At these wedding ceremonies, the powers that be just dressed little Noela like an angel; no kidding. This white lace costume—which went well with the pink nook made me cry. Hahahahah. I just kept crying.

    During rehearsal exercises as well as the ceremony the little bugger just ran around yelling:

    DADA DADA DADA

    But Dada could only be around momentarily most of the time.

    Grandma's and aunts and cousins and anyone available attempted to satisfy this loss communicated by the angel. Hahahahaha

    Of course this is where I first began to cry like an old woman (I know this sounds misogynistic but damn, old men do not wish to emulate old women. Hahaha) Actually I cried more than the women.

    The entire event that took 2 days to present and weeks to organize up in the middle of nowhere really impressed this hermit.

    There were present for the festivities, four grandpa's (two blood kin) and two grandma's (who kind of ran everything; hahahahah)

    All I could think of during the entire event was how important the extended family can be with regard to the raising of our children.

    I have to admit that I was embarrassed to be there; but Seany would have killed me if I would have not attended.

    But my youngest brother shows up for the festivities with some present that must have weighed forty pounds along with his beautiful daughter (age 16 and beautiful).

    My wonderful daughter shows up with her wonderful husband.

    Of course my ex wife shows up with her wonderful husband.

    And it gets a little embarrassing. I mean my kids as communicating surreptitiously during the entire period with their 'devices':

    WHAT ABOUT DAD. HOW IS DAD DOING? I AM WORRIED ABOUT DAD!

    Jesus!

    You ever feel like you are dragging everybody who counts, down?

    Sean's friend of 29 years shows up as best man. The two little buggers would steal my cigs and quarters as kids—they admitted their sins decades later. I of course, gave them absolution! (knowing full well of my own youthful indiscresions!)

    So in the middle of nowhere in Northern Minnesota, there is just a great representation for my son's side of things. Sean put forth a great face and I think he was proud!

    Of course the bride is escorted by the finest people you would ever wish to meet.

    Emmett, my brother, asked me at the reception about the bride's innocence? That is, he asked me if I felt she were shy.

    I paused and then went into a rant about women. Emmett after all these years still likes my rants.

    I told him that women are a puzzle.

    Since Emmett, who has a wonderful wife of 20? years, as well as a son who is thirteen and a daughter who is 16, knows a lot about women. Haahhaahah

    I just underlined that the Bride has three wonderful brothers. And I underlined the theme that a pretty young woman may seem shy at times, but a young woman with three brothers knows damn well how to defend her turf. Hahahahah

    I am pretty sure during one of my rides with Emmett that his beautiful daughter (who entertains the exact same name as the Bride by the way) giggled at my intuitive comment. Hahaaha.

    Emmett told me that when he presented his son to his three year old daughter; the baby pissed on her face. Hahhhahahah. You cannot make this stuff up. Hahahahahahh

    I commented:

    HI SIS, NICE TO MEET YA!

    We need siblings.

    We need to know that we are not the only precious stones in the quarry, so to speak.

    I am at the hotel and wander down for a cig at the ground floor veranda/porch following the rehearsal.

    And this little girl shows up and asks me for a light.

    Shouldn't you be in school?

    I AM TWENTY!

    Okay, okay I said. I gave her the light and we entered into a discussion.

    I have two jobs, she said. I work here and then at.....

    I have two kids.

    Well how old are your children?

    Six months and two years.

    Oh, my goodness that is a hard row to hoe (it is not a hard road to hoe you idiots, you do not hoe roads)

    The little angel receives a communication from a grandma regarding the complications involved in actually seeing her grandchildren on her device.

    We talk some more.

    Her boyfriend baby-sits the kids while she fulfills her 70 hours or more a week schedule.

    (Do you really think, Representative Gohmert, that she spends her food stamps on crab legs?)

    The blood father is long gone.

    Did you ever feel like holding a stranger in your arms and telling them that things are going to be okay?

    It took all of my energy (like I have a lot of energy) to hold back and not make an ass out of myself.

    One of the angel's jobs was to work at this motel in the middle of nowhere and she asked:

    Well tell me, how do you like the service here?

    And I said:

    It stinks and the carpets and the wall paper should be destroyed and....

    No, I did not do that. I am a prick but not that big of a prick!

    I love this place and everyone is doing a fine job and I love this place!

    We spoke some more and then she found her ride and I went back to my room and wept.

    My little grandchild will not experience any of this. At least the odds are in her favor!

    EVERYBODY and I mean EVERYBODY cares about Mom and Dad and little Noela. Hhahhahahah

    My son has worked since he was 12 years of age just like me and his sister and....

    If bad things happen, there is an extended family.

    And I know, I know that these three people will never be abandoned.

    How do I know?

    Well, how do we really know anything?

    My son will never abandon his wife and child.

    My daughter will never abandon her niece.

    The two Grandmas will never abandon their angel.

    Four grandpa's will never abandon their granddaughter!

    Cousins and brothers and friends will never abandon their own.

    RIGHT NOW THAT IS ALL I GOT!

    UP HERE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE!

     

    The end.

     

    But you know, we are all attempting to find our way back home!

    (This is one of my favorite remembrances of all time.

    So, I amend to protect one of my songs therein, so to speak.

     

     

     

     

    Comments

    If bad things happen, there is an extended family.

    I know what you mean. I've understood for a long time just how unfair life is. I didn't do anything to deserve the wonderful parents I have, nor the wonderful grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. Without my family, it is inconceivable that I would have the wonderful life that I now enjoy.


    by Verified Atheist on Sun, 09/08/2013 - 4:01pm

    Oh now Atheist, you have me crying again like an old woman.

    Maybe it aint that bad to cry like an old woman.

    haahahah

    We are stuck with government or corporate authority.

    In the end, we need family.

    WELL PUT!


    by Richard Day on Sun, 09/08/2013 - 4:14pm

    Hey, you old fool.  Old woman here:  You made me smile a lot throughout this.  Except for that part about the hotel staff--okay, that's sad.  She shouldn't have to work 70 hours a week, leaving her kids with someone who may or may not care that much for them.

    But that part about your little Noela being protected by everyone who loves her--that's what saved you after you kept repeating you "cried like an old woman".  Wonderful.

    Let me tell you--by the time women get old they're all cried out.  On the other hand, I've noticed that the older men get the more they're apt to cry.  I can't explain it, but it's really kinda sweet.


    by Ramona on Sun, 09/08/2013 - 6:57pm

    Oh Ramona, you could feel the love. How can this phrase be a cliche?

    If it is a cliche, wonderful! ha

    I am crying now just thinking about it.

    Oh that little 20 year-old.

    She struck my heart and that is another cliche.

    Women are tougher than mere men for sure, just like this little woman with the two babies.

    Life is good for me.

    I wish it were for everyone!


    by Richard Day on Sun, 09/08/2013 - 8:50pm

    I know you like movies.  This is a Hallmark movie from 2010.  You can find it on the internet.  You will like this.  It really ties in with the young lady you met.  Here is the trailer to the movie.  

     

     


    by trkingmomoe on Tue, 09/10/2013 - 5:57am

    A beautiful piece, DD.    I think older men just get to the point where we no longer have to care about projecting that fake image of masculinity and so we begin to let real life seep in and our embarrassingly deep emotions run out.  I cry at TV all the time now.  And this piece had me tearing up too.  Thanks ... and Congrats on the wedding.  Mazeltov, etc.


    by MrSmith1 on Sun, 09/08/2013 - 7:53pm

    You know Smith, Ramona says that the women eventually get all cried out! hahahaha

    See, I am crying right now. hahahah

    SOMEBODY CARES!

    That is the phrase that just keeps on keepin on for some reason.

    I cannot keep it out of my head.

    See--all that comes to mind are cliches. 

    hahahahahah


    by Richard Day on Sun, 09/08/2013 - 9:02pm

    I've missed you, Richard.  And I love weddings.  And kids who bring everybody together.

    I hate it that 20-year-olds with two kids have to work 70 hours a week in order to keep those kids fed, happy and safe. 

    I hate that way more than "I cried like an old woman".  But surely you must understand why I had to comment.  Even though I love what you write.  And you're pretty funny.  And you're a grandpa any little Noela would love. wink


    by Ramona on Sun, 09/08/2013 - 10:45pm

    I know what it is like to be embarrassed to be somewhere around relatives.  I am not crying but a little wet in the eyes for you. I was feeling your discomfort.  It is like riding a bike, you never forget how it feels.  I learned as a child to keep my tears private.  It is ok to cry at weddings of your kids.   Non of my kids had weddings.  Here in Florida you can have a Noterary marry you. So I didn't get to do any crying or fussing about.  

    You see more of the reality of our society then most of your family because of your experiences.  That is why you get angry.  It would never dawn on some people to have empathy for her for being so young and having to work so hard to support her kids. Yes, things will get better for her because her generation is going to change it so it will.  


    by trkingmomoe on Mon, 09/09/2013 - 4:09am

    I would hope that the younger among us would somehow prevail.

    From all you have written, I came to the conclusion that you took up the burden of helping your family.

    How is that grandson of yours, by the way, who is intrigued by real history?

    I hope he keeps asking questions.

    It is only by asking questions that we ever get anywhere!


    by Richard Day on Mon, 09/09/2013 - 7:49pm

    The oldest one is in his third year of college.  He gets his AA in December.  He starts to University of South Florida in Jan.  The 10 year old thought he was kicked out of gifted but it turned out that they didn't hire a teacher this year.  Florida keeps cutting public education.  They are doing fine.   


    by trkingmomoe on Tue, 09/10/2013 - 1:17am

    Congrats, Dick! Thanks for this lovely piece.


    by Michael Wolraich on Mon, 09/09/2013 - 1:46pm

    Thank you Mike!

    Nice of you to take the time to read my stuff.

    I swear that I witnessed no animosity at this function.

    A little different from my memories going back several decades!


    by Richard Day on Mon, 09/09/2013 - 5:17pm

    I swear that I witnessed no animosity at this function.

    You are extra blessed, then! It was good to hear of a wedding where everything was truly so happy. In my experience, too often after the bride and groom have disappeared and the many libations have had their effect, old family grudges start bubbling....


    by artappraiser on Tue, 09/10/2013 - 6:25am

    I used to be dragged to these things in my younger days.

    I swear I never laughed more that I did when I went to a reception and witnessed mean people all pissed off. hahahahahah

    Maybe because the grandparents were all in my age group and they all had weathered good and bad times over the decades; there just was not enough energy for meanness or revenge or bad feelings.

    Anyway, this was an event I really appreciated.


    by Richard Day on Tue, 09/10/2013 - 2:47pm