As America celebrates President Barack Obama's birth certificate as well as Osama bin Laden's new eye hole, one bit of news managed to get by that will likely have a bigger effect on the U.S. - Chrysler announced a profit:

Chrysler has posted its first quarterly net profit since declaring bankruptcy almost two years ago, Reuters reports.  

Since this is "Ding dong, bin Laden is dead" day, I'll note that we still have the same problems with energy depletion and financial shenanigans and unemployment that we had yesterday. Perhaps killing OBL will gain Obama some slack with people spending $50 to fill their compact cars. But for how long?

While running the worst campaign for President in the history of campaigns for President, John McCain made one thing very clear - He knew how to get Osama bin Laden. He just wouldn't tell anyone unless he was elected President.

John McCain says in almost every stump speech that he knows how to capture Osama bin Laden and that he’d follow the al Qaeda leader to the “Gates of Hell.”

It took me years to finally venture over to Twitter to see what all the fuss was about.  I was one of those who thought everything about it was silly, including and especially the name.  And what was with that 140 character limit?  Anything I wrote would be called a "Tweet".  Uugh.  No!

NEW YORK - On his way to the latest meeting of his multi-level marketing business, Donald Trump stopped and told reporters today he accepts full credit for the killing of Osama bin Laden.

As already noted here at Dag, a NATO air strike killed Gadhafi's son and narrowly missed the dictator and his wife.  The way I see it, this isn't the war we were sold.  Weren't we told quite explicitly that Ghadhafi wasn't being personally targeted?

So, Barack Obama has given in to the birther lunatics -- or rather, to their enablers in the national press -- and released his long-form birth certificate. Which of course, won't stop the lunatic birthers. But it's not clear that Obama actually intends it to. This is in many ways a classic Obama move.

In town hall meetings being held across the country during Congress' two-week recess, American citizens are filling the ears of Republican legislators with objections to the party's budget plan, particularly proposed changes to Medicare that would replace direct coverage with subsidies for private insurance.

Rep. Lou Barletta, R-Pennsylvania, quoted in a New York Times article Tuesday, tried to play down the objections, but his explanation inadvertently exposed the flaw in his party's political strategy.

If President Barack Obama understood conspiracy theories, he wouldn't bother releasing a copy of his long-form birth certificate to placate Birthers. Because there's one thing you have to know about these types of conspiracies - facts just make them crazier and more loyal to the conspiracy.

But Obama has sent out copies of his birth certificate already:

 Michigan, our wonderful, beautiful jewel of a state--the only state in the union that looks like a mitten reaching up to grab a leaping rabbit, the only state surrounded on three sides by three different really Great Lakes, the only state that can lay claim to both Vernor's Ginger Ale and Sanders Hot Fudge Sauce, has been in the news a lot lately.

In the United States of America - where only 75 people have ever traveled abroad (note: possibly not a factual statement) - the State Department has decided to pepper new passport applicants with questions that are both increasingly private in nature and, well, just plain annoying.

From Consumer Traveler:

Today is Earth Day.  Ever since 1970 we've been setting aside April 22 to celebrate the birth of the earth. (It also happens to be Lenin's birthday but I promise there is absolutely no connection.  I only mention it because some subversive with a tea cup is sure to bring it up, and I want to be able to say I got there first.)

There's sad news from Princeton where a lecturer who was apparently in danger of losing his job has taken his own life. That's a terrible thing.

Tenured Radical links to Nick Parker's Boston Globe piece about the life of adjunct college faculty, and adds some advice of her own to people entering the adjunct life. Both pieces are worth a read.

Just moments after not being able to win back custody of his kids from a wife in rehab, Charlie Sheen shocked the world by coyly mentioning he may consider a run at the White House.

“I know I promised this wouldn’t be political, but look where we f— are, man!” said Sheen. “I would legalize pot. Everywhere. Vending machines, all of it. And subsidize everything.”

There's no question about it.  The people have the right, no the obligation, to see the President's birth certificate.  I don't even care if it says he was born in Kenya.  Because, says Donald Trump, if Obama releases his birth certificate, Trump will make his tax returns public.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Using his bare hands, Republican Rep. Paul Ryan choked an 85-year-old woman to death last night, earning praise for his “serious” attempt to balance the United States Federal Budget.

There was nothing the least bit brave about Paul Ryan’s GOP budget that would slash the social safety net and enrich the already rich. Ryan’s work – like all his work – is partisan cowardice based on a long-held Conservative strategy – Starve the Beast.

My pal Jan started this yesterday on Facebook with a "Hooray!  Hooray!  It's Grilled Cheese Sandwich Day".  I'm shocked that I didn't know about GCSD.  I love those things!  But when Jan crabbed about her favorite sammich getting the recognition it so richly deserves for only one day, I wondered what I could do to make her feel better.

Here it is!

never talk about Biden becoming President?

If you really didn't believe that Barack Obama was Consitutionally eligible for office, wouldn't that make Biden (who shared Obama's fat majority in the Electoral College) President? Yet that never comes up.