Donald Trump is an easy-going guy. Just yesterday, he shrugged off the United States' longstanding position on the Israel-Palestine dispute and announced that he's totally open to a "one-state" solution.
"So I'm looking at two-state, and one-state, and I like the one that both parties like. I can live with either one," he burbled to the press with his friend "Bibi" Netanyahu beaming by his side. "I thought for a while the two-state looked like it may be the easier of the two," he continued, "but honestly if Bibi and if the Palestinians--if Israel and the Palestinians--are happy, I'm happy with the one they like the best."
One state, two state, whatever the kids are into these days.
But what is this one-state solution to which Trump so cheerfully consented? He didn't say. Neither did Bibi. But Yishai Fleisher, a radical settler who presents himself as a spokesman for the Jewish community of Hebron, is not so circumspect. In a New York Times op-ed, he matter-of-factly rattled off five "credible" plans for appropriating Palestinian land and eviscerating the dream of Palestinian statehood.
Option 1: Israel annexes the entire West Bank; Palestinian residents become ex-patriot Jordanians. Thus with a stroke of a pen, millions of Palestinians who have lived in the West Bank for generations are transmuted into permanent immigrants from Jordan--with no voting rights or path to citizenship in their own land.
Option 2: Israel annexes the best bits of the West Bank and permits Palestinians "self-rule" in the rest. This proposal would legitimize the status quo by making Israel's land grab official while leaving the Palestinians in permanent limbo.
Option 3: Similar to option 2 but the West Bank Palestinians are split into seven disconnected city-states. Fleisher likens these mini-states to the Arab emirates, but they're more analogous to the pseudo-state black homelands of apartheid-era South Africa.
Option 4: Israel annexes the entire West Bank and permits Palestinians to become citizens with full voting rights. To make this scenario plausible, he fantasizes that Israelis will reproduce faster than Palestinians in order to maintain a 60-40 Jewish majority. As a back-up, he proposes "an arrangement more like that of Puerto Rico" where Palestinians lack the right to vote in national elections. Once again, South Africa offers a better analogy.
Option 5: Israeli agrees to "an exchange of populations with Arab countries." According to the convoluted reasoning, Palestinians living in the West Bank would be "exchanged" with Jews living in Arab countries as if they were prisoners of war. Since most Jews from Arab countries have already emigrated to Israel, the exchange would be backdated to include them. Future "exchanges" would largely consist of Palestinians moving, or rather being moved, out of Israel. Of course, there is a much more straightforward term for this process: ethnic cleansing.
So there you have it. Five credible one-state solutions guaranteed to satisfy all parties, or at least all the parties that Donald Trump cares about. "I think we're going to make a deal," he cooed. "It might be a bigger and better deal than people in this room even understand."