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jollyroger's picture

Prez: "Cat food! It's what's for dinner. (And we ain't talkin' Fancy Feast, nor even IAMS..it's Meow Mix for you, Granny.)

Notwithstanding public pronouncements to the contrary by Joe "too far over his skiis" Biden, and Harry "Mitt Romney pays no taxes" Reid, we learn today that Barry "shiv-in-your-back" Obama is feeling the pain of House Repugnants with such poignancy that he finds it neccessary to bargain away a big chunk of Granny's outyear meal budgets; throwing Boehner a bone as it were, by snatching it from Granny's teeth.

jollyroger's picture

One revolver per person. No semi-automatics, no shotguns, no hunting rifles.. Yes, we are coming for your guns.

I offer for debate: The only legitimate purpose of a firearm is to equalize the odds while you await the police.  It will have a mandatory trigger lock, and someday a palm print activated safety.

 

Therefor, if you feel the need (or have the greed) to wipe out unarmed mammals, use a Bow.

 

All firearms to be licensed.  You may possess a revolver.( plus  a speed loader if you need it, and only one.)

 

We will amend the constitution.

 

Yes, we are coming for your guns, and we shall have them.

 

 

jollyroger's picture

Support your local suicide hotline

It is perhaps easy to overlook that the final death in Newtown was that of the shooter.

 

Don't get me wrong--I would have cheerfully supported snuffing this piece of shit preemptively were it possible, even though I passionately oppose the death penalty after a crime has occurred.

 

That said, inasmuch as  the staggering majority of mass killings are  "murder-suicides"  it seems to me that a relatively accessible "mental health" amelioration of our  plight would be more adequate funding and personning of suicide prevention hot lines.

 

jollyroger's picture

Prez:"Boehner debt ceiling budget blackmail? Homey don't play that!" B.S.? Bluster? Bluff? Or Benko gambit?

We hear tough talk from Prez (not for the first time...) vowing that any attempts by John Boehner to leverage a fiscal bargaining position by demanding concessions as a quid pro quo for raising the debt limit are non starters.

 

jollyroger's picture

Security state eating its own. I'm lovin' it!

Let's get one thing off the table to.start with: As a sex-positive, semi-retired stripper I endorse the Broadwell-Petraeus liaison on principle. More sex is better than less sex.

That said, it is beyond delightful to see how the advocates, indeed, the very practitioners, of diminishing the hurdles to surveillance now dangle at the business end of their petards.

jollyroger's picture

Hey, Prez! (you worthless punk) Four steps to a fifth face on Rushmore.

With fear and trembling we turn towards the second term agenda.

Let's pretend that Obama has learned a thing or two besides how better to fake feisty.

These are a few of the several crucial pivots off the recent election that will give some hope for a new House majority in 2014, failing which we will continue deadlocked and stymied.

Prez, your mission should you choose to accept it: Lock in the components of your coalition, bring them directly to bear upon specific House repugnants rendered vulnerable by votes forced upon them over the next two years.

jollyroger's picture

Desperately Seeking Saviour: Heroic IRS agent, a nation turns its lonely eyes to you.

"Where am I going?". This was my cousin Tracy's charmingly naive response to my question :"What do you pack?" (.a Glock as it turned out). I had just learned that her recent accountancy degree had brought a job with the IRS, specifically the C(riminal) I(nvestigation) D(ivision).

jollyroger's picture

Prez to Pashtuns:"OK, we'll leave you medieval tribal nut cases alone. But we're taking your women with us, you murderous pigs. Blanket asylum for Pashtun women. How ya like us now?"

When the subject of our impending Afghan exit is discussed, it is common to lament the wretched condition to which the women of that country will be abandoned. On the Pakistani side of the Durand line, the same or worse oppression obtains.

jollyroger's picture

Goin' tribal, gettin' on the bus to Philly.

Some coming weekend morning, as the busses deploy from Atlantic Center at the unforgiving hour of 8:30, I will drop an extra 20 mg. of Adderall to steel myself against the unfamiliar glare of the morning sun, and set off to go door-to-door for that worthless punk, Obama.

 

jollyroger's picture

Help wanted: Gunslinger. Must be licensed to practice in the State of Utah.

Billy the Kid, hero of my earliest youth, would have known how to right this wrong.

Withal, as trial lawyers are alternately known as "gunslingers" (it never bothered me a bit...) someone needs to ride into town and destroy two subhuman life forms, if only by way of crushing punitive damages.

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