Blog Posts

An Election Day Wish: End Precinct Voting

In an age where we can pull $1000 out of any ATM worldwide, it's absurd that we're stuck in an age-old tradition of going to a particular precinct on a particular day to stand in a pretty retro booth to vote.

There's no reason not to have voting places where everyone can vote if we can't just do it via our mobile phones (yes, there are considerations for voting fraud, but as new last minute software for Ohio machines shows, we have this to contend with anyway).

Why to Vote Against Obama


Alan Grayson catalogs: “a socialist nightmare hellscape.”

Obama Unjumps Shark?

Perhaps like Katrina was a turning point for Bush's presidency, Sandy will be a turning point for Obama's.

After 4 years of 11-dimensional chess, this one's curiously a no-brainer - get help to people quick, get the power back on, get the payments in, streamline response.

I was ready to write a column about how we could get resources in *before* the storm, since we knew they'd lose power, subways would be flooded - and there's Brownie criticizing Obama for acting too quickly. Well that's a good side of the fence to be on.

Winners & Losers

Winner - Lena Dunham, now the viral video Obama Girl 2012 along with monster book advance - I feel a bad Foreigner hit coming on...

Loser - Donald Trump, still finding ways to look ridiculous post-The Apprentice

Winner / Loser - Mourdock, finding the positive side to Richard Speck and Albert DeSalvo, and portrayed as Voldemort on Stephen Colbert, has earned himself a lucrative earlier-than-expected post-congressional Fox career. 

4th Estate as 5th Column

I disagreed with Emma a few days ago over the idea we needed more "hacks", but now I'm reconsidering...

Bob Somerby as usual's doing a bang-up job tracking the media madness, and in 2 particular areas his observations fit together -

1) the media pack has gotten chummier of late with its Groupthink as Twitter helps them align their stories (sad, but bars used to serve this purpose, and at least then you could say you got a buzz)

Mourdock/Warhol lunch at Palm

Seen by society folks, Andy met Richy at The Palm, and seems Rich is the go-to-gal for heart-felt emotions, at least for this 15 seconds. Main theme - no such thing as bad publicity, and that new gig at Fox holding up God's values won't hurt at that, what with unexpected retirement. Mourdock took occasion to show he's man of the earth by not bitching about the vinaigrette dressing. And you probably thought he was a Hoosier or something...

Romney sneezes; more proof he's presidential

By agreeing with every word the president said, Romney proves he's more presidential than the president.

Ironically, for a guy who rode into town on the back of post-partisan politics, Obama seems to have forgotten the lesson he mastered in the first debate - "just shut up and everyone will hate you". ("Everyone" being anyone from 5 or so media outlets who rawk our world)

Dems still without defense?

Bob Somerby has been noting the month-long right-wing attacks on Susan Rice (over many columns). It seems that both Fox & CNN keep distorting and cherry-picking what Rice said and that her original next-day comments contained the bulk of what we know now:

The consulate was attacked on 9/11. Information was incomplete, so hard to draw conclusions, but seemed a protest similar to Egypt's was co-opted by a Libyan militant group, that may or may not have ties with Al Qaeda.

MetaBol: grouch-o-thon

I fess up - I called a blog owner a turd, and called a turd a blog owner. Still working out which is worse, but a few more therapy sessions should cure it.

I will express some regret and nostalgia - I've written humor, multilingual expositions, hard core analysis, searing diatribe, and kumbaya all-inclusiveness. But as Groucho said (or was it The Grouch?), it wasn't here.

Big Bird Wins Debate


Rather dumb of Mitt to take on Big Bird personally.

"I love Big I'm going to kill him!!!"

The perfect embodiment of "compassionate conservatism".

Lessee, a character 80 million Americans have watched as kids, 95% of preschoolers watch.

A mainstay for GOP & Dem moms keeping pre-schoolers on educational programs vs. video games.

A new initiative to bring more Hispanic culture to public TV.


Personal Information

Defies gravity Can spit really far Almost touch my toes Can cut a fly's legs off with a beer cap from 20 paces Know how to say useless stuff and prattle on in a dozen languages Don't know when to shut up
Favorite Quotes
To be for or against the Plague, it's much the same thing. Fiddledee, how a body shure do get around - just 2 weeks ago I was in Mississippi and now I'm all the way to Tennessee... Eat or Be Eaten Better to be pissed off than pissed on.
Born in swaddling clothes (designer, of course) at the confluence of big waters, my first recorded words were "Dad, can I have the keys to the car?" Raised a Southern Pedestrian, my musical talents were recognized at an early age, leading to my being exiled to the shed out back with a stack of books that became my eddykayshun - advanced readin', writin' & ritmytick, creating a major quandary of "what will I do, oh what will I do?" (Gunslinger) As an old black man advised in song, "You Gotta Move", so move I did, traveling the byways sideways even a lot of driveways, picking up sticks and psychological tics, even movin' to Beverlee through a quaint misunderstanding of the seriousness of TV series, until finally I blew up so big the carry nation incarnation tarnation couldn't hold me no more, so I fixed my sights on yonder sitar, and like Queequeg and Paul Bowles and one of those abducted kids by the Pied Piper of Hamelin, I ventured forth to the larger world, pickin' and grinnin', doin' me some reckonin' and naughts from naughts, occasionally rightin', building me some buildings and wiring and just trying to understand the babble comin' out of people's mouths and heads, I finally ended up in what Rummy quaintly calls "New Europe", which ain't so new from what I sees, but that pit in my stomach from lack-of-moving-sickness finally disappeared, and instead I sit behind a whopping big desk stacked with missives from all the chiefs with big whampum around the world telling me "what's going on". Which seems like a load of boolshit to me, but I guess that's what keeps me busy and entertained now, separatin' the weeds from the chapstick. So my name is Perry Keys, or Peracles to you, and since my mammy always said, "say please and thank you", I added the please, but I'm holdin' back on that thankee until I feel you've earned it. But do welcome, and I hope we's a gonna have a real good time. It all starts with, "I wuz born a poor young white chile livin' in the South..." and we cycle through again, like Nietzsche and his infernal regurgence. So enjoy, and let's spin a spell...


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